1680.] THE NOBLE INNKEEPERS. 383 



hood to keep her company, their only study being then 

 how to deceive the old sinner at home. This difficulty they 

 soon found the means of overcoming. For this purpose it 

 was agreed that Rochester should disguise himself in woman's 

 clothes, and that while the husband was feasting with the 

 duke, he should make trial of his skill upon the old woman 

 at home. He had learned that she had no aversion to the 

 bottle, when she could come secretly and conveniently at it. 

 Equipped like a country lass, and furnished with a bottle of 

 liquor, he proceeded to the house of the old miser. It was 

 with difficulty he found means to speak to the old woman, 

 but at last obtained the favour. He began to tell the occasion 

 of his coming, in hopes of being invited into the house, but 

 could not gain admittance further than the porch, with the 

 door ajar. He was now obliged to have recourse to his last 

 expedient, and, pretending to be suddenly taken ill, fell down 

 upon the threshold. The noise brought out the young wife, 

 who with some trouble persuaded her keeper to help the 

 stranger into the house, from the regard to the decorum of her 

 sex, and the unhappy condition she was in. The door had not 

 been long shut before the impostor by degrees recovered, and, 

 being placed upon a chair, canted a very religious thanks- 

 giving to the old gentlewoman for her kindness, observing 

 how deplorable it was to be subject to such fits, which often 

 took her in the street and exposed her to many accidents ; but 

 every now and then she took a sip at the bottle, recommend- 

 ing it also to the old duenna, who was sure to drink a hearty 

 dram. Rochester had in his pocket another bottle qualified 

 with opium, which he presented to the woman, who, drinking 

 it with greediness, soon fell fast asleep. Overjoyed by his 

 success, and inflamed with desire, his countenance changed 

 colour, which made the artless victim of his base passion 

 imagine that the fit was returning. He took advantage of 

 her apprehension to ask if she would be so charitable as to 

 let him lie down on the bed. The good-natured creature 

 showed him the way, and, staying by him at his request, he 

 began to make some indirect inquiries concerning her husband, 

 whom she painted in his true colours, as a surly, jealous old 



