254 THE COMPLETE SPORTSMAN 



at that time suffering oppression at the hands 

 of the Czar. But when the toastmaster, in a 

 stentorian voice which echoed through the 

 banqueting-hall, announced: " Silence, if you 

 please, ladies and gentlemen, for Mr. Buffoon /" 

 I at once forgot all the brilliant impromptus 

 I had so carefully prepared, and was forced to 

 sit mutely down " with all my music in me." 

 I thus disappointed a number of most worthy 

 persons who had looked forward to a humorous 

 condemnation of the governments of alien 

 nations ^^dth hopes which the toastmaster' s 

 suggestive version of the orator's name had 

 raised to fever pitch. " This," as the sajdng is, 

 " was the last feather in the camel's cap." 



If an idiotic surname too often proves an 

 intolerable burden, what shall be said of the 

 grim tragedy that shadows the lives of those 

 luckless beings whose parents have provided 

 them with utterly inappropriate labels at the 

 font ? It is the modern fashion for members 

 of the so-called " lower " classes to supply their 

 children with aristocratic Christian names un- 

 suitable enough to damn the career of the most 

 hopeful offspring. The late Lord Br anc aster 

 once informed me that when he was engaging a 

 new third footman, in the Jubilee year, he was 

 compelled to ignore the claims of the four most 

 suitable applicants for the post, solely because 



