" N " OR " M " 255 



they were named Percival, Cyril, Marmaduke, 

 and Aubrey. The vacancy in his lordship's 

 pantry was eventually filled by a man of poor 

 physique, whose calves were not more than five 

 or six inches in circumference, and whose only 

 recommendation lay in the fact that his name 

 happened to be Thomas. 



A very natural prejudice exists against the 

 employment of domestics with fancy names. 

 In many households, indeed, it is the custom 

 to call every new footman John, regardless of 

 the feelings of his sponsors, and thus avoid the 

 danger of having to ring the bell, and say: 

 " Oh, Montague, kindly telephone to the Stores 

 and countermand that threepenny worth of 

 shrimps which her ladyship ordered for tea." 



I am bound to confess that I myself was once 

 acquainted with a confidential groom called 

 Lancelot, who kept his horses in wonderful con- 

 dition — there wasn't a spavin in the whole stable 

 — and I have known two instances of most 

 worthy chauffeurs bearing the names of Stanley 

 and Cuthbert; but these were undoubtedly 

 exceptional cases, and it may be laid down as a 

 general rule that no self-respecting household 

 should dream of employing a domestic thus 

 picturesquely christened. Many a bright young 

 steward' s-room boy has consequently set forth 

 upon his promising career, bearing the fatal 



