270 THE COMPLETE SPORTSMAN 



political career has he been so flattered, so 

 touched, so moved by anything as he has been 

 by the graceful remarks of the Chairman. Add 

 the statement that he has never seen so repre- 

 sentative a meeting as that which it is his 

 privilege to address to-night, and that never in 

 the annals of history has his particular party 

 presented so united a front. 



Stir the Hecklers until they bubble over with 

 shouts of " Marconi !" " Mangel - wurzels !" 

 " Rotten !" " What about Old Age Pensions ?" 

 and similar facetious party cries. Mix these 

 with screams of " Votes for Women !" uttered 

 in shrill tones by the Suffragettes. Let the 

 Earnest Persons frown and say " Sh-sh !" to 

 the Hecklers, and let the Ushers carry the 

 Suffragettes shrieking from the building. Smack 

 the Suffragettes soundly with the hands of all 

 Earnest Persons within range as they are borne 

 out. Add several Appeals for a Fair Hearing 

 from the Chairman and a few more Patriotic 

 Airs from the Grand Organ. 



When order has been restored, let the Dis- 

 tinguished Politician continue his address. Let 

 him say that he ventures to think, if his memory 

 is not at fault, and unless he is greatly mistaken, 

 that in this very hall, so many years ago, another 

 great meeting was held at which an Eminent 

 Statesman adumbrated some definite policy or 



