The Hunt Dinner 351 



horse ahead of me refused, and of course I bumped into 

 him, and the rider fell off. When he got up he also began 

 to abuse me like a pirate. " What do you mean by riding 

 in my pocket ? " he roared. " How did I know your old 

 bloke of a horse was going to refuse ? " said I. 



" * Then I thought I would keep away from every one 

 as a sure guarantee of not getting into any more rows, for 

 you may be sure I had experienced quite enough of it by 

 this time ; so I went through a gate, and was crossing a 

 field all by myself when I heard some galoot shouting, 

 " Ware wheat, ware wheat ! " and I saw an old hayseed of a 

 farmer running after me. This was a little too much. I 



pulled up. " Now see here," said I. " What the do 



you mean by shouting at me like this ? What the are 



you hollering at, you fool ? Go lock yourself in the barn 

 and hire some one to lose the key," said I, just to give this 

 impudent fellow the same treatment every one had been 

 giving me. I had been insulted by everybody, from Master 

 to stable-boys, and my monkey was up, I can assure you. 

 " Ware wheat ! " shouted the hayseed. " Wear it yourself," 

 I replied. 



" ' " Get off the wheat ! " he shouted. This jarred me, 

 for I was in a ploughed field and not on the wheat at all. 

 " I '11 not go until I get ready," said I. Then the old cuss 

 came for me with a pitchfork. I turned my horse to go 

 out of the field, with the farmer after me, clubbing and 

 prodding my horse with the pitchfork. The going was 

 deep, and my old nag had to take it at every jump. In 

 clearing the fence into the woods he jumped so high 

 that I was caught by a limb and knocked off. " Good 



