EASY-CHAIR MEMORIES 125 



this I would prefer to stick to my post till death 

 releases me. It only means freedom and change 

 of occupation. 



That respectable old humbug, as he called 

 himself, Barnum, the great showman, once told 

 me that he retired from business for a short 

 time, and he began to feel ill ; he sent for his 

 doctor. The doctor said, " There's nothing the 

 matter with you. Go back to business at once, 

 or you'll die of that dire disease called ' Nothing 

 to do ' ! " He went back to business, and lived 

 ten years afterwards. Well, I cannot go back to 

 business. My friends tell me I am too old and 

 imbecile ; they want young blood in business, 

 to stir it up, and make it rush and boom ; some 

 of them even favour the notion, held by certain 

 wild and savage nations in remote corners of the 

 globe, that old men are useless encumberers of 

 the ground and ought to be tomahawked, or 

 shot, or electrocuted, to make room for the 

 rising generation. I disagree with them, toto 

 calo ! 



As I have no desire to lapse into idleness, I 

 must begin to regulate my doings by certain 

 fixed rules of conduct. There are two points 

 which strike me that I must consider at once 



