CHAPTER II 



THE FOOT DRAG 



Both mongrel, puppy, whelp, and honnd. 



Oliver Goldsmith. 



HERE are various ways of beginning a 

 history : the Gryphon, for example, 

 told Alice to " Begin at the beginning, 

 go on till you come to the end, 

 then stop." Alice, if you remember, 

 was requested to repeat You are Old 

 Father William ; and the plan is 

 excellent both for little boys and 

 girls who have to learn repetition 

 and say it off in school, standing 

 primly with heels together and hands 

 behind their backs, and for village 

 concert nuisances who think they can 

 recite. But with a history things are different, and with histories 

 such as that of America, or Oxford, or Socialism, or the Trinity Foot 

 Beagles the method is impossible, because they have not ended, but are 

 still going strong, and probably will be for many a day to come. Even 

 with a novel the plan is not always good. The author starts with a 

 description of the terraced lawns and pleasant glades of a country 

 house in summer, or the back blocks of Australia, or a house in the 

 Five Towns, or an Indian bungalow, or the Sahara, or the cabin of a 

 cargo schooner, according to the scenery he can best describe. The 

 stage being prepared, enter a He and a She, who after various compli- 

 cations are to be married and live happily ever after. Or they are 



26 



