SELF-DENIAL. 407 



have to part. I should see her at least every morning and 

 every evening when I came home from work. But when I 

 thought of a close house in the heart of the City ; of no care 

 for her but that of a coarse miserable drudge of all-work ; no 

 companionship but that of my noisy neglected little brothers 

 and sisters, I faltered in my wish ; and when I looked at her 

 fragile form, grown of late so tall and thin, and at her trans- 

 parent, flower-like complexion, "Ah, Lucy!" thought I, 

 " should I be indeed thy friend, should I indeed take care of 

 thee, to have thee transported, if /can hinder, from this sweet 

 pure air these fields, and woods, and flowers, and from the 

 wings of our tender Dove, thy faithful gentle nurse, whose 

 heart too is breaking at the thought ?" And when Lucy her- 

 self, on my father's asking her if she would go to London and 

 see the carriages and shops, hung down her head in sorrowful 

 silence, the struggling self within me was subdued, and I en- 

 treated and obtained consent that she should be kept at least 

 for a year or two in Dolly's care. 



My father returned first to business, leaving me and Caleb 

 to follow, after the latter had seen to the completion of some 

 arrangements for the sale (for the benefit of his creditors) of 

 my poor uncle's furniture and effects. His cabinet of insects 

 and a few of the least costly of his books on entomology my 

 father, at my request, contrived to save for me. 



During the week or two which Lucy and I passed together 

 before the day of parting, I noticed few comparatively of her 



