90 THE farmer's relationships. 



she is miserable. It makes little difference whether the intent 

 be to oppress. If the result is oppression, she is unhappy. 

 The wife thinks continually of the happiness of her husband 

 and family. She constantly sacrifices herself for their comfort 

 and welfare. If she is repaid by the little attentions she 

 received before marriage it is all she asks. She seldom gets 

 them, and that this is true is evidence of the meanness of 

 men. Work does not hurt a health}'' woman any more than 

 it does a healthy man, and the girl who becomes a farmer's 

 wife expects to work, but she ought not to work more hours 

 than the man does, nor to work at all when unable to do so. 

 She does both. There are very few farmers' wives who do not 

 work hard for days when their husbands, feeling no more 

 able, would lie on the bed and be waited on. Doubtless some 

 of this is inevitable. Most of it is not. The farmer could 

 make his wife's life easier if he would, and he would if he 

 were less selfish. He thinks less of his wife than of his 

 stomach, and in this American farmers are the worst offenders 

 in the world. We commiserate the lot of the European wives 

 who work in the field. They probably have an easier life 

 tlian the American wives who kill themselves cooking and 

 washing dishes while their husbands sit by and smoke. 



To most men women are incomprehensible. They love 

 flowers and ribbons, and all things that are beautiful. They 

 not only love them, but must have them or be unhappy. 

 They like a friendly chat with a neighbor, and a horse to 

 go and visit. They enjoy social intercourse to relieve the 

 monotony of their lives. The farmer may care for none of 

 these things. His work is not monotonous and his business 

 takes him about. He comes home to rest while his wife must 

 go away to rest. These things she pays for, and if she does 

 not get them she is cheated and yet can not help herself 

 The wife studies her husband and knows him through and 

 through. No weakness of his is hid from her, and since the 

 man will not pay his debt to her in a manly way, she plays 

 upon his weakness to get her dues by indirection. Watching 

 her time she cooks a good dinner and then asks for help to 

 make her flower garden. The rest obtained by going away 



