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NEW ENGLAND FARMER. 



FOR TUi: A'F.W ENCLA.VD FAR31ER. 



THE RICH MAN AXD THE POOR BOY. 

 A certain lad, who was a iva; complete 

 Whom even a yankee pedlar could not cheat, 

 Full of finesse, and paltry cunning tricks, 

 As rogues who shine in party politic?, 

 Oucc met a coxcomb with less brains than cash, 

 THio therefore undertook to cut a dash 

 By dint of money, having nought beside 

 To form the underpinning of his pride. 

 " May't please your honor, sir," the urchin said, 

 " Give me two cents to buy some ginger-bread." 

 " I give you cents! — you little vile clod-hopprr, 

 " Two kicks I'll give you, sooner than one copper. 

 " Give you two cents! — that would indeed be funny, 

 " You stand in need o( manntrs more than monry,"' 

 " Sir," said the lad, " I ask your honor's pardon. 

 " My case you must acknowledge is a hard one ; 

 " For neither cash nor manners / ean boast of, 

 " 1 therefore ask'd for what ijuii had the most of." 



FOR THE SEW F.NGI.AKD FARMER. 



THE SCHOLAR WHO LOST HIS KEY-HOLE. 



A scholar, once, who had been drinking till he 



Was quite impertinent and somewhat silly, 



Came reeling home 'twixt twelve and one at niglit, 



Fumbling his way to bed without a light. 



But bellows out as loud as he could roar, 



" Somt rogut has stoVn Iht l,i i/-holc lo my door .'" 



From the American Daily Advertiser. 

 Extract of a letter from an American gentleman 



in Smyrna, dated 21th May last, to hi.i friend 



in Philadelphia. 



" Our situation in this conntry continues to be 

 very distrcssiniij, and our t'utnrc prospects most 

 nncert;(in. Notwithstanding- the strong hopes 

 that now exist, that a war with Russia will not 

 take place, I must confess, I cannot much flatter 

 myself with that hope. The Turks, by their 

 conduct, will lorce Kussia, if not eventually all 

 the Christian powers, to declare war asfainst 

 them. The Island of Scio, containing- a popula- 

 tion of about one hundred and fifty thousand, 

 has been taken by the Turks. This island wa« 

 by far the richest of any of the Archipelago. 

 The Turk*, on their appearance, held out pro- 

 mises of pardon ; they met with scarcely any 

 resistance, still all the men have been killed, 

 and the women and children made slaves, and 

 daily pass through this ]>laco, on their way to 

 different parts of Asia. To behold a young lady 

 of respectable family, brought up in all the ease 

 of alUuence, a slave to some Turkish IJoor, is 

 most distressing. Other scenes, far worse, we 

 arc obliged to see and hear of daily. Strict or- 

 ders are given tc prevent any of Ihese slaves 

 from being sold to any Christian ; slill, howev- 

 er, a few, very fow, are saved in this way, at a 

 great expense. 



" The Turkish licet and the Greeks are now 

 in presence of each other; the force of the lat- 

 ter is very inferior lo the former, still they do 

 not venture to attack them. The Greeks wail 

 to find them at anchor, with the hopes of burn- 

 ing them ; should they succeed, we may expect 

 great disturbances here.'" 



About GO blacks were convicted at Charles- 

 ton, for being concerned in the late conspiracy, 

 .'j4 of whom were executed, and the rest sen- 

 tenced to be transported. 



From the Baltimore I'atriol of August 14. 



DROUGHT. 



The northern and western parts of Maryland, 

 and Ihe adjacent parts of Pennsylvania, have 

 suffered from a drought tliis season to a de- 

 gree, unprecedented within the memory of the 

 oldest persons living, hi York, (Peni^) no rains 

 of consequence had taken place on the llith inst. 

 from the preceding 21st of February, the time 

 of the fresh — and for the la=t two months, there 

 had not been a shower. Not one mill out often 

 could grind at all, and the few that could, were 

 not able to supply the dom ind. Farmers have 

 been obliged to go twenty miles, to get as much 

 ground as woidd supporl their families. The 

 Vork paper seriously stales, ibat a few v.-ecks 

 more of dry weather, would compel the inhabi- 

 tants to resort to Baltimore for flour I ! The 

 summer crop.s have almost altogether failed. — 

 " Some fields will not yield a grain of Corn, and 

 the best of them not more than a few bushels to 

 the acre." \'erbal reports and letters confirm 

 these statements, and in fact, give even more 

 gloomy views of the state of the crops and the 

 streams in the adjacent part of our state. 



The York Gazette says, " we hoar daily of 

 springs that were considered never-failing, disap- 

 pearing, and the people, like the thirsty throng 

 of Israel, have to go miles in quest of water to 

 sustain themselves." 



Although nothing like the distress alluded to, 

 has been experienced in Baltimore and its vicini- 

 ty, the season has been of late very dry. Y es- 

 terday the dried plains received partial refresh- 

 ment from timely showers, which have caused a 

 perceptible difference in the atmosphere. 



CHOICr. OF A WIFE. 



As notwithstanding all that wit, or malice, or 

 pride, or prudence, will be able to suggest, men 

 and women must at last pass their lives togeth- 

 er; I have never, therefore, thought those wri- 

 ters friends to human happiness, who endeavor 

 to excite in either sex a general contempt or 

 suspicion of the other. To persuade those who 

 arc entering the world, and looking all abroad 

 for a suitable associate, that all are etpially vi- 

 cious, or equally ridiculous; that they who "trust 

 arc certainly betrayed, and they who esteem 

 are always disappointed, is not to awaken judg- 

 ment, but to inflame temerity. Without hope 

 there can be no caution. Those who are con- 

 vinced that no reason for preference can be 

 found, will never harass their thoughts with 

 doulil and deliberation ; they will resolve, since 

 they are doomed to misery, that no needless 

 anxiety shall disturb their quiet, they will plunge 

 at hazard into the crowd, and snatch the first 

 hand that shall be held towards them. That 

 the world is over-run with vice cannot be de- 

 nied ; but vice, however predominant, has not 

 yet gained unlimited dominion. Therefore, 

 those who undertake to initiate the young ami 

 ignorant in the knowledge of life, should be 

 careful to inculcate the possibility of virtue and 

 happiness, and to encourage endeavors by pros- 

 pects of success.— Jo/uiii'o»i. 



From a Philadelphia Paper of August 17. 

 We were yesterday highly gratified with the 

 sight of a man walking on the water by the help 

 of the life preserver. He jumped boldly into the 

 middle of the Delaware, and made his w-ay ag- 

 ainst the tide with apparently but little exertion. 

 The length of time which it took to put on and 

 adjust tl>e dross, struck most of those present as 

 a serious objeetion, but we learn that ihis incon- 

 venience will be remedied in anew dress vi-bich 

 the inventor is now preparing; and we have no 

 doubt tliat the invention inay prove useful in 

 cases of shipwreck near land, where, not unfre- 

 qucnlly, it only one can escape to shore, meant 

 ma}' be obtained of saving the whole crew. 



President Adams has recently given in imme- 

 diate possession to his native town, Quincy, near- 

 ly two hundred acres of land, containing in a part 

 of it an inexhaustible quarry of stone for buil- 

 ding houses; the whole ]irocceds to be appropri- 

 ated to religious and literary purposes from gen- 

 eration to generation. He has also given to the 

 lovvn his whole library consisting ol' highly val- 

 ui'.ble books, in various languages. This has al- 

 ready come into possession of the town. 



Portsmouth Journal. 



Aa eminent Physician, who was acquainted 

 with the dangerous effects of Lead on the hu- 

 man constitulion, recommended those who re- 

 ceived their su])ply of water through Leaden 

 Pipes., to have the water which had been stand- 

 ing in the pipes through the night, drawn oif 

 every morning, before they drav,- for the use 

 of their families. 



There is a dear and precious period in the 

 life of man, which, brief as sweet, is best ap- 

 preciated in recollection ; when but to exist i* 

 to enjoy ; when the rapid pulse throbs wildly 

 with the vague delight which fills the careless 

 heart, and when it may be truly said, that noth- 

 ing is, but what is not. 



There is not the greatest man living but may 

 stand in need of the meanest, as much as the 

 meanest does of him. 



When the heart is deeply involved, every 

 sense allies itself to its feelings, and the eye 

 beholds no object, and the ear receives no 

 sound, which, in the first impression, awakens 

 not the master pulse of emotion. 



Pielations take the greatest liberties, and give 

 the least assistance. If a stranger cannot help us 

 with his purse, he will not insult us with his 

 comments; but with relations, it mostly happens, 

 that they are the veriest misers with regard to 

 their property, but perfect prodigals in the arti- 

 cle of advice. 



PRONf.NCIATIO.V. 



Sir David Dundas spoke in Parliament witlr 

 a broad Scotch accent. " I say, Mr. Speaker," 

 said he upon one occasion, " it is not in the 

 poor [power] of this house to do so." " What," 

 Slid a country member, " does the advocate of 

 Scotland mean by talking of the poor of this 

 hoijse ?" '• He means, I suppose," said Mr. F,. 

 •• the forty-five Scotch members." 



A person having asked his physician how- 

 much daily food was required to nourish and 

 support the body, the physician replied, " One" 

 jiound of Ibod will support m;in ; should he take- 

 more; the man must support the Ibod." 



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