384 



NEW ENGLAND E A R M E R . 



MAY 89, 1844. 



MISCELLANEOUS 



How Scholars are Made. — Cosily Apparatus and 

 spleridul cabincls, have no magical power to nial<e 

 scholars. In all circumstances, as a man is, under 

 God, the master of his own fortune, so ho is the 

 maker of his own mind. The Creator has so con- 

 stituted the human intellect, that it can grow only 

 by its own action. Every man must, therefore, in 

 an important sense, educate himself, flis books 

 and teachers are but helps ; the work is his. A 

 man is not educated, until he has the ability to 

 summon, in case of emergency, all his mental pow- 

 er in vigorous exercise to eflect his proposed ob- 

 ject. It is not the man who has seen most, or who 

 has read most, who can do this ; such an one is in 

 danger of being borne down, like a beast of bur- 

 den, by an overloaded mass of other men's thouo-hts. 

 Nor is it the man that can boast merely of native 

 vigor and capacity. The greatest of all warriors 

 that went to the siege of Troy, had not the pre- 

 eminence because nature had given hiin superior 

 strength and he carried the largest bow, but be- 

 cause self-discipline had taught him how to bend 

 it. — Daniel IVehsltr. 



Cor — You misunderstood me. I ulludn to men- 

 tal aberration. 



f^il- — Sonic think he was. 



Cor — On what grounds ? 



"i'- — I believe they belonged to Squire Waters. 



Cor Pshaw ! I mean, was he mad ? 



Wit. — Sartenly. 



Cor. — Whnt, devoid of reason ? 

 "i'- — Why, he had no reason to drown himself 

 1 I news of. 



in company 



An English Jury. — An English paper states as 

 a fact, that of a coroner's jury recently held near 

 E.icmoor, nine signed their names by marks, being 

 unable to write. The following are some partic- 

 ulars of the examination : 



Coroner. — Did you know the defunct? 



Witness —\W\xo's he? 



Cor. — Why, the dead man. 



Wit.— Yes. 



Cor. — Intimately ? 



Wit.—WeTxy. 



Cor — How often have you been 

 with him .' 



Wit Only once. 



Cor. — Do you call that intimately ? 



^^it — Yes ; for he were werry drunk, and I 

 were werry drunk, and that made us like two 

 brothers. 



Cor. — \\'hn recognized the body ? 



Wit. — Jack Adams. 



Cor — How did he recognize him .' 



Wit. — By standing him on his head to let the 

 water run out. 



Cor — I mean how did he know him .' 



Wit. — By his plush jacket. 



Cor. — Anything else .^ 



^it- — No; ony his face were so swelled, his 

 own mother would not have kuow'd him. 



Cor. — Then how did you knnw hini ? 



Wit. — Cos I warn't his mother. (Applause.) 



Cor. — What do you consider the cause of his 

 death ? 



Wit. — Drowning, of cours>;. 



Cor. — Was any attempt made to resuscitate him ' 



Wit.— Yds. 



Cor. — How .' 



Wit. — We searched his pockets. 



(■or. — I mean did you try to bring him to ? 



flit- — Ves — to the public house. 



Cor. — I mean to recover him.' 



Wit. — No. We warn't told to. 



Cor. — l)id you ever suspect the deceased of 

 mental alienation? 



Wit. — Yes; the wliolo village suspected him. 



Cor.— Why ? 



Wit- — 'i'hat he alienated one of Squire Water's 

 T)ig8. (Applause.) 



The Use of Marrying. — Galignani's Messen- 

 ger relates the following amusing aneccote : 



A jolly young fellow, named Roubille, made his 

 appearance at the bar of the Correctional Tribunal, 

 (Paris) with such a stereotyped smile on his lips, 

 expressive of self-contentment and good nature, 

 that every one present was astonished when it was 

 found that he was charged with beating his wife. 

 'J'he following colloquy ensued between the Presi- 

 dent and the prisoner : 



" You are accused of beating and kicking your 

 wife." 



"Aye, aye — it's a habit I've got." 

 "You would do well to get rid of it." 

 " Of my wife? I should like nothing belter." 

 " No, no, not that — you know perfectly well 

 what I mean. Have you any reason to complain 

 of your wife ?" 



" I do n't know that I have. But you must see, 

 when I am in a rage it must fall upon something, 

 and as my wife is always at home, why she catches 

 it." 



" You show a most deplorable want of feeling." 

 '•If it did not fall on her, I should be breaking 

 the furniture ; but there 's no such risk, you know, 

 in striking my wife." 



Here the President exclaimed — "Hold your 

 tongue man ! you only aggravate your offence." 



The Tribunal sentenced him to two months im- 

 prisonment, on hearing which, his everlasting smile 

 left him and he remarked, " Well I certainly did 

 not expect that. Two months for slapping one's 

 wife! What's the use of marrying!" 



WILLIS' LATEST IMPROVED SEED SOWEI 

 In usin;; this machine, the farmer may be cutaiii thi 

 Ins seed is put into the ground, and at the same lim 

 in the best possible manner. There h,is been a grei 

 difficulty in machines liir sowing garden seeds; the 

 are very apt to clog up, and the farmer niiglit gu over a 

 acre of hind and not sow a single seed ; but not so wit 

 this; it is so conslrucled that it cannot possibly cloj 

 In using this sower, the farmer ran save one half i 

 his seed, and do the work at less than one quarter th 

 expense of the common way of sowino-, and hare 

 ilone in a much better manner; it ope'ns the fiinovj 

 drops the seed covers it over and rolls them down 

 It will sow any kind of Garden Seeds ; say Ruta Bag! 

 Mangel Wunzel, Turnips, Carrots, Beets, P.irsnips, On 

 ions, ^-c. For sale at the New England Agricniluri 

 Warehouse ami Seed Store, Nos. .51 and 52 North Mai 

 ket street, by JOSEPH BRECK & CO 



Poor, Dear Lady .' — The London correspondent 

 of the New York Journal of Commerce writes — 



" It is said that a proposition will be submitted 

 for augmenting the income of the Queen, on the 

 score of her increasing family, and that her Majes- 

 ty having become pecuniarily involved, will seek 

 from her faithful parliament a relief from all her 

 difKculties. Her present debts are stated to be 

 £100.000 sterling: the support of herself, husband 

 and court costs John Bull £470,000 a year — or 

 about 2,l'iO,000 dollars! It certainly must be very 

 difficult to keep within such an income." [What 

 a curse is royalty !] 



respect t 

 nimiliee at the late tria 



KITRATK OF SODA FOR AORICUI.TURAI. 

 PURPOSES, 



BENJAMIN BANGS, No. 39 & 40, Lewis' Wharf, has 

 for sale, a quantity of the aliove named article, which lias 

 been much approved of iu Eii^laiul, and as far as used iii 

 this counlry has been found highly beneficial on grass land, 

 trees and plants generally. 



Boston, March 20, tS44. 3m 



GRINDSTONES ON FRICTION ROLLKRS. 



Grindstones of different sizes, hung on friction rollers ana 

 moveu wilh a foot treader, are lound lobe a great improve- 

 ment on the old mode ofhanginy grindstones. Stones hung 

 in Ibis manner are becoming daily more in use, and wherever 

 used, give universal salisfaclion. The rollers can he attach- 

 ed to stones bung in the common way. For sale fiy J 

 BRKCK &• Co., No. 51 North Market street. 



HOWARD'S IMPROVED EASY DRAUGHT PLOUGH, 



Great improvements have been made the past year in th 

 form and workmanship of these Ploughs ; the mouhl h, ar 

 has heen so formed as to lay Ike .furmt -.omplctebi ora 

 l.„ r'J '" 'fr'-'J'"!'"'' "fS-rass or stnhhie, and, earing Ih 

 " m1 "'J''t *?' P'"'''''' morincr. The lengih of th 

 mould hoard has been very much increased, sS that th 

 I lough works wilh Ihe grealest ease, both with 

 the holding and the team. The Co 

 of Ploughs at Worcester, say 



" Should our opinion be asked as to which of the Ploughs 

 we should prefer for use on a farm, we might perhaps say t, 

 he inquirer, if your land is mosilv light and easy to work 

 try 1 routy & Mears, hut if your land is hcamj, hard orrockv 



BEGIN WITH Mk. HowABD'.?.'' 



At Ihe above mer.f.oned trial the Howard Plough die 

 more icork with the same p«iner of team, than any olhm 

 Vlougk exhibUcd. ^o other turned more than twentysevef: 

 and one half inches, to the 112 lbs. draught, while lh<' 

 Howard Plough turned twcvtynine and one half inches, u\ 

 Ihe same poirer of team ! All acknowledge that Howard's! 

 Ploughs are much the strongest and most substamialh 

 made. -"I 



Th. 

 or la 



having to furnish a new iandside; this shoe likewise secures^ 

 the mould board and Iandside together, and strengthens tliel 

 Plough very much. 



The price of the Ploughs is from S6 to $15. A Plough I 

 sutlicient for breaking up with four cattle, will cost about 

 SIO 50, and with cutler Si, with wheel and cutter, $2 fiO 

 extra. 



The above Ploughs are for sale, wholesale and retail, a« 

 ihe New England Agricultural Warehouse and Seed Sti.rsi 

 Nos. 61 & 52 North Market Street, hy 



JOSEPH BRECK & CO. 



'here has lieen quite an improvement made on the shoe.l 

 and side of this Plough, which can be renewed without! 



NEW ENGLAND FARMER 



A W'F.tKLT PAPKR. 



Terms, $2 per year in orfronce, or f 2 50 if not paid 

 within sixty days. 



N. B.— Postmasters are permitted by law to frank all 

 subscriptions and remittances for newspapers, without 

 expense to subscribers. 



TUTTLE AND DENNETT. PRINTERS. 



21 School Sltree. 



