A Sportsman at Large 41 



resist the temptation to slip in a good story or two d propos 

 our distinguished " Head," Dr. Butler. 



He had a peculiar and distinctive manner of speech which, 

 to be appreciated, had to be heard ; but all old Harrovians 

 of his time will be able to set the music of his silken voice to 

 my libretto. 



There was in " Skipper " Holme's house a lad of the name 

 of Beatty. At the age of eighteen, and when passing his last 

 term at Harrow he became reckless, and used not only to break 

 bounds, but actually to venture within the portals of public 

 houses, there to acquire and consume beer, a heinous offence 

 indeed ! One day he was caught ftagrante delicto, by no less 

 a personage than the venerable and white-bearded Rev. 

 Thomas Steele, who, of course, " sent him up." The head- 

 master was shocked. " You are a great big boy, Beatty," 

 he murmured sorrowfully, " and you are high in the School. 

 As a rule, it irks me to inflict corporal punishment on such ; 

 but your offence is rank, and I can conceive no lesser punish- 

 ment that would meet your case : therefore, oh, Beatty, I 

 must request you to meet me in the Fourth Form Room 

 forthwith." 



When they met on the fateful spot, Butler spoke again : 



" And now, Beatty, I neglected to inquire of you who 

 sent you up ? " 



" Why, that x. y. z. (awful and abominably coarse swear 

 words) old fool, Tommy Steele, and I'll see him and you to 

 H before I take a licking so there ! " 



The good " Head " was thunderstruck ! For a few 

 moments he was too paralysed and scandalized to speak. 

 At last he drew himself up and with a majestic wave of the 

 hand uttered this short but priceless speech : 



" Oh ! ! ! Go far far away HORRIBLE BEATTY ! ! ! " 



And Beatty went. 



But his name has been ever treasured in the archives of 

 Harrow. He has even been canonized, and is recalled as 

 St. Beatty ! 



A friend of mine, bringing his son to the head-master's 

 house, told me that Butler had thus addressed the new 

 boy : 



