126 A Sportsman at Large 



Angler. " Sir ! I would not imperil my immortal soul, 

 just for one dod-rotted bass believe me. No, siree ! " 



Stranger. " But how come it, Buddy, as you was ketchin' 

 striped bass ? It's sure the close season fer them critturs ! 

 I'm figuring you'se up agin a fine of a dollar a tail all round." 



Angler. " Gee ! I kant help that, stranger. Them fishes 

 was thar an' I was thar. I sure had to pull 'em out, right 

 thar on the spot, close time or no close time ; but may I 

 ask who may I be havin' the honour of addressin' ? " 



Stranger. ' Why, cer'nly ! I'm the fishiri warden. May 

 I inquire where you hail from and what you are ? " 



Angler (in a subdued voice). " As fer where I come from, 

 let it pass. As to what I am ! I'm figuriri to be the biggest 

 liar in the whol' of the U-nited States, and I'm all fer changing 

 the conversation ! " 



Which goes to illustrate my contention that vain boasting, 

 which has not even the virtue of being founded on fact, is 

 apt to overreach itself, and lay out its manipulator in 

 boomerang fashion. But it sometimes happens that a thump- 

 ing lie is used for the purpose of rebuking a similar lapse from 

 the straight and narrow paths of truth one scarcely less 

 outrageous than itself. For instance, two Englishmen were 

 holding forth anent their wonderful and quite unbelievable 

 exploits in the gentle art of Walton, when an American, who 

 had been " listening in " most sympathetically, joined issue. 



" Say, gentlemen," he began, " you guys have seemingly 

 had some fine adventures among the ' scaleys/ but I'm 

 figurin' I can tell you a story what'll whip to a frazzle any- 

 thing you have mentioned. It was this way : Me an' my 

 pard, Joe K. Slosh, is dead nuts on the sea-fishin' proposition ; 

 so we chartered a sloop and pegged down south-east of Blue 

 Point about a mile out. We was usin' a chain cable for a 

 line, and a two-ton anchor for a hook. When we had let 

 down a hundred and forty fathoms there was a bite ! Gee ! 

 some bite I'm tellin' you. The cable was run off the capstan 



with a h of a rattle. The sloop was pulled right out from 



her moorin's, and we was dragged four leagues out to sea. 

 Then our fish began sinkin' deep, and we was in peril of bein' 

 drawn down to the uttermost depths. There was nothin' 



