474 MEMOIR OF GEORGE WILSON. CHAT. XI. 



"With all this, let me not forget to say that I have enjoyed a 

 peace and composure of spirit, interrupted only by a few impa- 

 tient bursts, such as I have seldom known. The meaning of 

 Life, the purpose of God, the worth of this world and the next, 

 have all risen into a prominence which they had not formerly 

 displayed. I was not expecting or seeking this. It came 

 upon me like the wind blowing where it listeth. I have 

 rejoiced to welcome it, but it has for the time driven me rather 

 in upon my own thoughts than led me to pour them forth to 

 others. 



" I should add [as an excuse for not writing] that I have an 

 immense deal of official correspondence to keep up, which de- 

 vours the writing faculty, and also that I am trying to be done 

 with the Memoir of Edward Forbes. There, however, some of 

 those who should have been foremost to help have forgotten 

 their promises. ... I am sickened at the work." 



To his cousin Alick he gives an epitome of his engagements 

 since spring. Amongst them is a lecture in Glasgow, which has 

 been noticed already in the list of things to be done all at the 

 same time. The lecture was requested by an Association of 

 Teachers. " It was a capital audience, and I had prepared with 

 some care an hour's written discourse on the ' Educational Value 

 of Industrial Science.' I had also, however, taken with me a 

 sort of appendix, consisting of the best part of an old lecture ; 

 and when the hour was done, I left them to say whether I 

 should stop or go on. They left me in no doubt as to their 

 choice, so I gave them another half hour, in which they heard 

 some things which I hope would do them good. ... It is 

 curious the feeling of having an audience like clay in your 

 hands to mould for a season as you please. It is a terribly re- 

 sponsible power. ... On looking back I am struck with the 

 little good I knmv these performances to have done, or can on 

 the highest estimate suppose them to have effected. 



" Against that, however, I can set off a steadily increasing in- 

 difference to applause or commendation. I do not mean for a 

 moment to imply that I am indifferent to the good opinion of 

 others. Far otherwise ; but to gain this is much less a concern 

 with me than to deserve it. It was not so once. I had no wish 



