THE SECRETARY. 



(Published in 'The Horse Review," December 29, 1891.) 



It was years ago that I first became infatuated with 

 trotting sport, and then I knew everything about the man- 

 agement of a secretary's office. One year after my ap- 

 pointment there was the faintest shadow of a faint suspi- 

 cion regarding it ; two years and the shade had deepened ; 

 three years, the shadow had grown still darker ; and in ten 

 years I found I knew nothing. The whole knowledge 

 was wrapped up in newspaper writers and theoretical 

 turfmen, scarcely any of whom had ever bred or owned, 

 or entered a horse in a race, or been identified in any way 

 with the management of a turf association — but yet who 

 knew it all. 



Bright skies, a good entry list, big crowds, close con- 

 tests, and a successful meeting is the goal of every good 

 secretary's ambition. But if it rains the secretary is at 

 fault; if the entry list is light he is cussed and blamed, 

 and if the races should prove one-sided and be won in 

 straight heats, that secretary is a deep-dyed renegade, a 

 fraud and a failure from way up Failure Creek. 



In case of a close decision in the judges' stand : 



"That's a of an association you're secretary of, isn't 



it ? Oh, yes ; I'll come back next year and trot. Didn't 

 you say I'd get a square deal if I entered here? That's a 

 fine lot of sand-baggers you've got up there garroting 

 horsemen, now ain't they?" 



