156 LIFE OF PROFESSOR HUXLEY CHAP. VII 



yet decided) ; for one at Aberdeen, which has been given 

 against me ; and at present I am a candidate for the 

 Professorship of Physiology at King's College, or, rather, 

 for half of it Todd having given up, and Bowman, 1 who 

 remains, being willing to take only half, and that he will 

 soon give up. My friend Edward Forbes a regular 

 brick, who has backed me through thick and thin is 

 backing me for King's College, where he is one of the 

 Professors. My chance is, I believe, very good, but 

 nothing can be more uncertain than the result of the 

 contest. If they don't take one of their own men, I 

 think they will have me. It would suit me very well, 

 and the whole chair is worth 400 a year, and would 

 enable me to live. 



Something I must make up my mind to do, and that 

 speedily. I can get honour in Science, but it doesn't 

 pay, and " honour heals no wounds." In truth I am 

 often very weary. The longer one lives the more the 

 ideal and the purpose vanishes out of one's life, and I 

 begin to doubt whether I have done wisely in giving 

 vent to the cherished tendency towards Science which 

 has haunted me ever since my childhood. Had I given 

 myself to Mammon I might have been a respectable 

 member of society with large watch-seals by this time. 

 I think it is very likely that if this King's College 

 business goes against me, I may give up the farce alto- 

 gether burn my books, bury my rod, and take to 

 practice in Australia. It is no use to go on kicking 

 against the pricks. . . . 



1 Sir William Bowman, 1816-1892, the ophthalmic surgeon, 

 closely connected with King's College Hospital. He was associated 

 with Todd in preparing his Cyclopaedia and his Anatomy of Man. 



