REMARKABLE PRESERVATION FROM DEATH. 343 



sea, at least never beyond that fatal ship. But now 

 I thought of home and the blessed things there, and 

 so intensely bright was that flash of heavenly images, 

 that for a moment my heart filled with happiness. It 

 was terrible when the cold and dashing waves broke 

 over me and that insane dreaming-fit, and awoke nie 

 to the conviction that there was nothing in store for 

 me but an icy and lingering death, and that I who 

 had so much to live for, was seemingly on that sole 

 account most miserably to perish. 



What a war of passions perturbed my soul ! Had 

 I for this kept my heart full of tenderness, pure, 

 lofty, and heroic, for my best -beloved and long- 

 betrothed? Had God kept me alive through fevers 

 and plagues, and war and earthquake, thus to murder 

 me at last? What mockery was all this? What 

 horror would be in my grey -haired parents' house 

 when they came to hear of my doom. " O Theresa ! 

 Theresa ! " And thus I wept and turmoiled through 

 the night. Sometimes I had little or no feeling at 

 all sullen and idealess. I wished myself drowned 

 at once yet life was still sweet ; and in my weak- 

 ened state I must have fallen from my frail vessel 

 and been swallowed up, had I not, though even now 

 I cannot remember when, or how, bound myself to 

 it. I had done so with great care ; but a fit of de- 

 spair succeeding, I forgot the circumstance entirely, 

 and in that situation looked at myself with surprise 

 and wonder. 



