THROES OF UNREST 



give rough answers when quite strangers, especially 

 Americans, became too inquisitive. Some presumed 

 on a casual chat to ask me to tell the whole story over 

 again. To begin with I couldn't have done so, for it 

 was a whole combination of circumstances, as I have 

 explained, which led up to the action the Stewards took. 



The number of nights which were spent trying to 

 make up my mind I can't count, but plans made when 

 lying awake were quite upset by a few words of en- 

 couragement the next day given by serious friends who 

 knew I supposed what they were talking about. 



I do not know whether this is all sufficiently clear, 

 but the only way I can describe it is that, what with 

 hope and fear, in 1902 I was going through H-E-L-L. 



199 



