326 MR. SPONGE'S SPORTING TOUR. 



there could be no mistake about ; " who do you (wheeze) that 

 is ? " 



" Deaf Burke," replied Mr. Sponge, after a stare. 



" Draf Burled (puff)," replied Jog, indignantly. 



" Who is it, then ? " asked Mr. Sponge. 



" Can't you see? (wheeze)," replied Jog, tartly. 



" No," replied Sponge, after another examination. " It's not 

 Scroggins is it ? " 



" Napoleon (puff) Bonaparte," replied Jog, with great dignity, 

 returning the head to the glove. 



He showed several others, with little better success, Mr. Sponge 

 seeming rather to take a pleasure in finding ridiculous likenesses, 

 instead of helping his host out in his conceits. The stick-mania 

 was a failure, as far as Mr. Sponge was concerned. Neither were 

 the peregrinations about the farms, or ter-ri-to-ry, as Jog called 

 his estate, more successful ; a man's estate, like his children, being 

 seldom of much interest to any but himself. 



Jog and Sponge were soon most heartily sick of each other. 

 Nor did Mrs. Jog's charms, nor the voluble enunciation of " Obin 

 and Ichard," followed by " Bah, bah, black sheep," &c, from that 

 wonderful boy, Gustavus James, mend matters ; for the young 

 rogue having been in Mr. Sponge's room while Murry Aun was 

 doing it out, had torn the back off Sponge's "Mogg," and made 

 such a mess of his tooth-brush, by cleaning his shoes with it, as 

 never was seen. 



Mr. Sponge soon began to think it was not worth while staying 

 at Puddingpote Bower for the mere sake of his keep, seeing there 

 was no hunting to be had from it, and it did not do to keep hack 

 hunters idle, especially in open weather. Leather and he, for once, 

 were of the same opinion, and that worthy shook his head, and 

 said Mr. Crowdey was "aw^ful mean," at the same time pulling out 

 a sample of bad ship oats, that he had got from a neighbouring 

 ostler, to show the " stuff" their "osses" were a eatin' of. The 

 fact was, Jog's beer was nothing like so strong as Mr. Puffington's ; 

 added to which, Mr. Crowdey carried the principles of the poor- 

 law union into his own establishment, and dieted his servants upon 

 certain rules. Sunday, roast beef, potatoes, and pudding under 

 the meat ; Monday, fried beef, and stick-jaw (as they profanely 

 called a certain pudding) ; Wednesday, leg of mutton, and so on. 

 The allowance of beer was a pint and a half per diem to Bartho- 

 lomew, and a pint to each woman ; and Mr. Crowdey used to 

 observe from the head of the servants' dinner-table on the arrival 

 of each cargo, " Now this (puff) beer is to (wheeze) a month, and, 

 if you choose to drink it in a (gasp) day, you'll go without any for 

 the rest of the (wheeze) time ; " an intimation that had a very 

 favourable effect upon the tap. Mr. Leather, however, did not like 



