mr. sponge's SPORTING TOUR. 99 



He knew if lie couldn't square matters at short notice, he would have 

 no better chance with an extension of time; so, if he saw things 

 taking the direction of inquiry, he would just laugh the offer off, 

 pretend he was only feeling his way — saw he was not acceptable — 

 sorry for it — and away he would go to somebody else. He looked 

 upon a woman much in the light of a horse ; if she didn't suit one 

 man, she would another, and there was no harm in trying. So he 

 puffed and smoked, and smoked and puffed — gliding gradually into 

 wealth and prosperity. 



A second cigar assisted his comprehension considerably — just as 

 a second bottle of wine not only helps men through their difficulties, 

 but shows them the way to unbounded wealth. Many of the bright 

 railway schemes of former days, we make no doubt, were concocted 

 under the inspiring influence of the bottle. Sponge now saw every- 

 thing as he wished. All the errors of his former days were apparent 

 to him. He saw how indiscreet it was confiding in Miss Trickery's 

 cousin, the major; why the rich widow at Chesterfield had chasseed 

 him ; and how he was done out of the beautiful Miss Rainbow, with 

 her beautiful estate, with its lake, its heronry, and its perpetual ad- 

 vowson. Other mishaps he also considered. 



Having disposed of the past, he then turned his attention to the 

 future. Here were two beautiful girls apparently full of money, be- 

 tween whom there wasn't the toss-up of a half-penny for choice. 

 Most exemplary parents, too, who didn't seem to care a farthing 

 about money. 



He then began speculating on what the girls would have. " Great 

 house — great establishment — great estate, doubtless. Why, confound 

 it," continued he, casting his heavy eye lazily around, " here's a room 

 as big as a field in a cramped country ! Can't have less than fifty 

 thousand a-piece, I should say, at the least. Jawleyford, to be sure, 

 is young," thought he ; " may live a long time " (puff). " If Mrs. J. 

 were to die (Curse — the cigar's burnt my lips " ), added he, throwing 

 the remant into the iire, and rolling out of the chair to prepare for 

 turning into bed. 



If any one had told Sponge that there was a rich papa and mamma 

 on the look-out merely for amiable young men to bestow their fair 

 daughters upon, he would have laughed them to scorn, and said, 

 " Why, you fool, they are only laughing at you ; " or, " Don't you 

 see they are playing you off against somebody else ? " But our hero, 

 like other men, was blind where he himself was concerned, and con- 

 cluded that he was the exception to the general rule. 



Mr. and Mrs. Jawleyford had their consultation too. 



" Well," said Mr. Jawleyford, seating himself on the high wire 

 fender immediately below a marble bust of himself on the mantel- 

 piece; I think he'll do." 



" Oh, no doubt," replied Mrs. Jawleyford, who never saw any 



