The Nineteenth Century 123 



would teach the yeoman of the guard to dance the binnacle horn-pipe into 

 the bargain." 



"His royal highness shall certainly hear your advice, Mr. Neptune; but 

 whether he will follow it or not, is not for me to say. Would you please to 

 drink his royal highness's good health?" 



"With all my heart, sir; I was always loyal to my king, and ready to drink 

 his health, and to fight for him." 



The captain presented the god with a bumper of Madeira, and another to 

 the goddess. 



"Here's a good health and a long life to our gracious king and all the royal 

 family. The roads are unkimmon dusty, and we hav'n't wet our Hps since we 

 left St. Thomas on the line, this morning. But we have no time to lose, captain," 

 said the sea god; I see many new faces here as requires washing and shaving; 

 and if we add bleeding and physic, they will be all the better for it." 



The captain nodded assent; and Neptune, striking the deck with the end of 

 his trident, commanded attention, and thus addressed his court: "Hark ye, 

 my Tritons, you are called here to shave, duck, and physic all as needs; but 

 I command you to be gentle. I'll have no ill-usage; if we gets a bad name, we 

 gets no more fees; and the first of you as disobeys my orders, I'll tie him to a 

 ten-inch mortar, and sink him ten Üiousand fathoms deep in the ocean, where 

 he shall feed on salt water and sea-weed for a hundred years: begone to 

 your work." Twelve constables, with thick sticks, immediately repaired to 

 the hatchway, and sent dovra all who had not been initiated, guarding them 

 strictly until they were called up one by one. 



The cow-pen had been previously prepared for the bathing; it was fined 

 with double canvas, and boarded, so that it held water, and contained about 

 four butts, which was constantly renewed by the pump. Many of the officers 

 purchased exemption from shaving and physic by a bottle of rum; but none 

 could escape the sprinkfing of salt water, which fell about in great profusion; 

 even the captain received his share, but with great good nature, and seemed 

 to enjoy the sport. It was easy to perceive, on this occasion, who were 

 favourites with the ship's company by the degree of severity with which 

 they were treated. The tyro was seated on the side of the cow-pen: he was 

 asked the place of his nativity, and the moment he opened his mouth, the 

 shaving-brush of the barber, which was a very large paint-brush, was 

 crammed in, with all the filthy lather, with which they covered his face and 

 chin; this was roughly scraped off with the great razor. The doctor felt his 

 pulse, and prescribed a pill, which was forced into his cheek; and the smelling- 

 bottle, the cork of which was armed with short points of pins, was so forcibly 

 appfied to his nose as to bring blood; after this he was thrown backwards 

 into the bath, and allowed to scramble out the best way he could. 



The master-at-arms and ship's corporals and purser's steward were severely 

 treated. The midshipmen looked out for the first lieutenant; but he kept so 

 close under the wing of the captain, that for a long time we were unable to 

 succeed. At length some great uproar in the waist induced him to run down. 



