246 MYSTIC ISLES 



"He 's off his onion," Stevens commented. "The 

 bally fool needs hard labor and raw feis/* 



The consul grinned. 



"Wait till you hear me read the document with the 

 suicide note. It's as good as Marie Corelli." 



"All right, old thing," answered Stevens. "Fire the 

 whole broadside!" 



"No, no; I'm goin' to sj^are you the whole official 

 document. It pretends to be a formal instruction to 

 this beef -headed flunky, from his guardian, of a test to 

 prove his mettle and gain experience to fit him for the 

 highest posts of the diplomatic service by going round 

 the bally world and doin' other people in for their tin. 

 It is a yard long, and was undoubtedly written by the 

 same dish-washer who wrote that doggerel on his shirt. 

 It promises him half a million sterling when he comes 

 back to London after visiting Australasia, China, India, 

 and other countries, and pickin' up his tucker free as 

 he goes. Also, the shark is permitted to send back for 

 coin at this date, and he must get married to a Tahitian. 

 He probably fixes it different in every country. It 's 

 signed, 'Your affectionate guardian, James Kitson, 

 Baron Airedale of Gledhow.' " 



"Whew!" spluttered Hobson, "the blighter has no 

 limits. Do you mean to tell me he ajets away with that 

 folderol?" 



"For months he has lived at Lovaina's, Fanny's, 

 and even on the Chinese. He has borrowed thousands 

 of francs, and spent it for drink and often for cham- 

 pagne. He did old Lovaina up for money as well as 

 board. She believes in him yet, and calls him Lord 

 Innes or Sir Gordon, but says she has no more to risk. 



