BADiN] THE PEYOTE CULT 413 



Then I thought of the other peyote eaters, how much they must be 

 wanting me to take it. After a while I spoke to Sam and said, 

 "I am going to eat this medicine, but . . ." Then T began to cry. 

 After a while he tried to get me to say the balance, but I couldn't. 

 I drank some of the solution. As the others saw that I was willing 

 to take it they gave me a big ball of dampened peyote. However, 

 I didn't like that and I asked for some more peyote in the dry state. 

 I sat there asking for more and more peyote. This I kept up all 

 night. When morning came I stopped. Just then Harry Rave got 

 up to speak, and no sooner did he get up than I knew exactly what 

 he was going to say. This must be the way of all peyote eaters, I 

 thought. I looked around me; and suddenly I realized that all 

 those within the room knew my thoughts and that I knew the 

 thoughts of all the others. Harry Rave spoke and finished his 

 speech; but I had known it all before he said a word. Then A. 

 Priest, who was leading the meeting, arose and asked the rest to 

 get up, so that they might turn themselves over to Christ. I also 

 rose; but when I got up I was seized with a choking sensation. I 

 couldn't breathe. I wanted to gi-ab hold of Bear and Sam, but I 

 didn't, thinking that I was going to stand whatever was coming to 

 me. When I made up my mind to that, I felt relieved. Then I 

 knew what the real meaning of turning one's self over to Christ 

 meant. 



In the morning they stopped the meeting and everyone seemed 

 happy and glad. I, however, was very serious and wondered why 

 they were all laughing. Every once in a while they would come 

 and talk to me. I wondered why they did it, when they knew what 

 was going on within me. For that reason I wouldn't answer them. 



That week there were four meetings, and I went to all of them 

 and ate very much peyote. The fourth meeting was at the usual 

 place, John Rave's house. I sat with Sam as usual. At night I 

 became filled with peyote. All at once I heard a voice saying, 

 "You are the one who is to tell of the medicine dance." And I 

 thought that Sam was speaking to me, so I turned around and 

 looked at him, but he hadn't said a word. Soon I realized that 

 nobody near me had said anything, and I began to think, "Why 

 should it be I^ Why not one of the others?" I rather pushed the 

 idea from me; but no sooner had I done so than I began to have a 

 tired and depressed sensation. Tliis passed all over me. I knew 

 that if I got up with the sincere purpose of giving in to the power 

 that was wanting me to speak of the medicine dance I should be 

 relieved. However, for some reason, I know not why, I felt like 

 resisting. 



The next morning I asked to be baptized, and said that I would 

 thereafter have nothing more to do with offerings to the spirits; 



