414 THE WINNEBAGO TRIBE [eth. ann. 37 



that I would not give any more feasts; and that I would not hare 

 any more to do with the medicine dance. From that day on I 

 quit all my old beliefs. I did not feel like saying all this, for indeed 

 my heart was turned just the other way, but I couldn't help it, for 

 I was filled with the peyote. 



From that time on, at every meeting that I attended, I could 

 not rid myself of the idea that I must tell of the medicine dance. 

 At all such times a feeling of heaviness would come over me. There 

 I would be with but one thing on my mind; should I, or should I 

 not, tell of it ? I did not want to, and thought of all sorts of excuses — 

 that I was not a member of the Nebraska division, etc. 



I was in this frame of mind while living with John Walker. There 

 I received word that I would be wanted to tell of the medicine dance. 

 From that moment I could not rest easy. I went to the bam and 

 prayed and wept, asking that God might direct me. I went about 

 but could not sit quiet. My wife stayed around me crying. As I 

 stood there, someone drove up with a white team. Then I thought 

 of all the unhappiness I would cause to members of the medicine 

 lodge if I told the secrets of the medicine dance; and I asked myself 

 if it really would not be a sin to cause so much misery. The man 

 who was driving the white team was John Baptiste, and he told me 

 that I was wanted to teU of the medicine dance. I got ready and 

 entered the buggy. I was still crying and praying. Then it occurred 

 to me that I would like to see John Rave. No sooner had I thought 

 of this than Jolin Rave appeared in the road. I got out and shook 

 hands with him and told him where I was going and for what purpose, 

 and asked him what he thought of the matter. He began to thank 

 me for the work I was going to do and said, " This is what we should 

 try to do, to help one another and to work for our Creator." Then 

 he thanked me again. Perfect happiness now came over me and I 

 went to Sioux City and got married legally. From now on I was 

 entirely filled with the desire to tell all that I knew about the medicine 

 dance. "This must be the work assigned to me by the Creator," 

 I thought; and yet I have rejected the idea all the time. 



On Paul's last trip, although I had not finished the translation, I 

 didn't care to have any more to do with it, and said that somebody 

 else should finish the work, my excuse being that I was busy. So, as 

 soon as I heard that Paul had come, I packed up and hurried out west 

 as quickly as possible, for I knew that he would bother the life out of 

 me if he found me. However, no sooner had I reached the home of 

 my friend than I was seized with an attack of rheumatism, with which 

 I had never been afihcted before, and the next morning Paul appeared 

 with a wagon to take me back to Winnebago. Now I know that the 

 telling and the translation of the medicine dance is my mission in 

 life, and I am willing to tell all to the full extent of my knowledge. 



