24 ttNPUBtlSHED LETTEftS OF ThE 



pleasure. I fear my proceedings liave met with, your disappro- 

 bation, and have therefore been wrong, — since it is more probable 

 you sh-ould judge impartially than myself. 



I am now fuUy of opinion that, were I convined of the 

 expediency of marriage, I ought not in conscience to propose it, 

 while the obstacle of S. J. remains. Whatever others have 

 said, I think that Lydia acts no more than consistently by 

 persevering in her present determination. I confess, therefore, 

 that till this obstacle is removed, my path is perfectly clear, 

 and blessed be God ! I feel very, very happy in all that my Grod 

 shall order concerning me. Let me suffer privation, and sorrow 

 and death, if I may by these tribulations enter into the kingdom 

 of Grod. Since we have been lying here, I have been enjoying 

 a peace almost uninterrupted. The S]3irit of adoption has been 

 drawing me near to God, and giving me the full assurance of 

 bis love. My prayer is continually, that I may be more deeply 

 and habitually convinced of His unchanging everlasting love, 

 and that my whole soul may be altogether in Christ. The 

 Lord teaches me to desire Christ for my all in aU — to long to be 

 encircled in his everlasting arms, to be swallowed up in the 

 fulness of his love. Surely the soul is happy that thus bathes 

 in a medium of love. I wish no created good but to be one 

 with him and to be living for my Saviour and Lord. may it 

 be my constant care to live free from the spirit of bondage, and 

 at all times have access to the Father. This I now feel, my 

 beloved cousin, should be our state — perfect reconciliation with 

 God, perfect appropriation of Him in all his endearing attributes, 

 according to all that he has promised. This shall bear us safely 

 thro' the storm. how happy are we in being introduced to 

 such high privileges ! You and my dear brother, and Lydia, I 

 rejoice to think, are often praying for me and interested about 

 me. I have of course much more time and leisure to intercede 

 for you than you for me — and you may be assured I do not fail 

 to employ my superior opportunities in your behalf — especially 

 is it my prayer that the mind of my dear cousin, formed as it is 

 by nature and by grace for higher occupations, may not be 

 rendered uneasy by the emplojTuents and cares of this. 



