6 Shadowings 



soon found every cause to think with regret of 

 Kyoto days. Then he discovered that he still 

 loved his first wife loved her more than he 

 could ever love the second ; and he began to feel 

 how unjust and how thankless he had been. 

 Gradually his repentance deepened into a re 

 morse that left him no peace of mind. Memories 

 of the woman he had wronged her gentle 

 speech, her smiles, her dainty, pretty ways, her 

 faultless patience continually haunted him. 

 Sometimes in dreams he saw her at her loom, 

 weaving as when she toiled night and day to 

 help him during the years of their distress : more 

 often he saw her kneeling alone in the desolate 

 little room where he had left her, veiling her 

 tears with her poor worn sleeve. Even in the 

 hours of official duty, his thoughts would wander 

 back to her : then he would ask himself how she 

 was living, what she was doing. Something in 

 his heart assured him that she could not accept 

 another husband, and that she never would refuse 

 to pardon him. And he secretly resolved to seek 

 her out as soon as he could return to Kyoto, 

 then to beg her forgiveness, to take her back, to 

 do everything that a man could do to make 

 atonement. But the years went by. 



