544 PSYCHOLOGY. 



death. I continued to wear my disgraceful fetters till towards the end 

 of January, 1775, when my rage, which had hitherto so often been re- 

 strained within bounds, broke forth with the greatest violence. On 

 returning one evening from the opera (the most insipid and tiresome 

 amusement in Italy), where I had passed several hours in the box of 

 the woman who was by turns the object of my antipathy and my love, 

 I took the firm determination of emancipating myself forever from her 

 yoke. Experience had taught me tliat flight, so far from enabling me 

 to persevere in my resolutions, tended on tlie contrary to weaken and 

 destroy them; I was inclined therefore to subject myself to a still more 

 severe trial, imagining from the obstinacy and peculiarity of my char- 

 acter that I should succeed most certainly by the adoption of such 

 measures as would compel me to make the greatest efforts. I deter- 

 mined never to leave the house, which, as I have already said, was 

 exactly opposite that of the lady; to gaze at her windows, to see her go 

 in and out every day, to listen to the sound of her voice, though firmly 

 resolved that no advances on her part, either dii'ect or indirect, no 

 tender remembrances, nor in short any other means which might be 

 employed, should ever again tempt me to a revival of our friendship. 1 

 was determined to die or liberate myself from my disgraceful thraldom. 

 In order to give stability to my purpose, and to render it impossible for 

 me to waver without the imputation of dishonor, I communicated my 

 determination to one of my friends, who was greatly attached to me, 

 and whom I highly esteemed. He had lamented the state of mind int» 

 which I had fallen, but not wishing to give countenance to my conduct, 

 and seeing the impossibility of inducing me to abandon it, he had for 

 some time ceased to visit at my house. In the few lines which I ad- 

 dressed to him, I briefly stated the resolution I had adopted, and as a 

 pledge of my constancy I sent him a long tress of my ugly red hair. I 

 had purposely caused it to be cut off in order to prevent my go^ng out, 

 as no one but clowns and sailors then appeared in public with short 

 hair. I concluded my billet by conjuring him to strengthen and aid my 

 fortitude by his presence and example. Isolated in this manner in my 

 own house, I prohibited all species of intercourse, and passed the first 

 fifteen days in uttering the most frightful lamentations and groans. 

 Some of my friends came to visit me, and appeared to commiserate my 

 situation, perhaps because I did not myself complain; but my figure 

 and whole appearance bespoke my sufferings. Wishing to read some- 

 thing I had recourse to the gazettes, whole pages of which I frequently 

 ran over without understanding a single word. . . I passed more than 

 two months till the end of March 1775, in a state bordering on frenzy; 

 but about this time a new idea darted into my mind, which tended to 

 assuage my melancholy." 



This was the idea of poetical composition, at which 

 Alfieri describes his first attempts, made under these dis- 

 eased circumstances, and goes on : 



