THE SCRATCH TEAM. 329 



up to the time of the assizes, when of course it 

 became necessary to go and hear the case tried by 

 one of her Majesty's judges, with an array of counsel, 

 all in their wigs and gowns. Their speeches, the 

 examination of the witnesses, and any jokes made in 

 court afforded a grand fund of amusement for some 

 time afterwards. The stupidity of the western agri- 

 cultural witness, I suppose, somewhat exceeded that 

 of other districts, and hence drew from one of the 

 judges at the assizes on the Western Circuit the 

 remark that the farther he went west the more con- 

 vinced he was that the wise men came from the east. 



I have rather wandered from Young Green, and 

 been somewhat diffuse in the history of his father in 

 order to account for his excessive simplicity in the 

 matter of business in which it will appear he was 

 concerned, and hence I have adopted for him the 

 name of Very Green. 



As nearly as I can tell, about the year 1834 Young 

 Green was in a wine-merchant's counting-house, at 

 the West End of London. Being much of my own 

 age, fond of coaching, and distantly connected, we 

 were a good deal together, and thus I became ac- 

 quainted with the dilemma into which he quite unin- 

 tentionally led his father. 



At the* period I have referred to there were no 

 Civil Service competitive examinations, and men who 



