A FASCINATED BOY 319 



you. What for you humbug Boss, Mickie ? " Jinny was 

 bashful, for the subject was momentous, touched her 

 pride, and had been depressing her gaiety for many weeks. 

 Presently she came and with emphatic deliberation said — 

 " Boss — No — good — Missis — call — out — Jinny ! Jinny ! 

 When want wash 'em plate. More better you hammer 'em 

 that fella, all asame Essie ! " Jinny did not wish that the 

 missis should be chastised, but that she should be summoned 

 to the plate washing with the pomp and ceremony of a 

 dinner gong, as the maid used to do in a more civilised 

 home. 



Fire Jump Up 



Mickie and Jinny once paid a visit to town, and Jinny, 

 making an afternoon call, was invited to have a cup of tea. 

 She said, "Never mind. Missis. Fire, he no burn." A 

 gas stove was available, and Jinny jumped and exclaimed 

 as the blue flame sprang from nowhere. Wherever the 

 lady of the house pleased to apply a match the fire came. 

 Next morning Mickie was brought round to witness the 

 wonder. Jinny asking — " Missis. You show 'em Mickie fire 

 jump up all about ! " 



Slop Teeth 



A lady up North was asked by her black maid, whose 

 face had been terribly battered by her infuriated husband, 

 to send to the shop for new teeth, in payment of which she 

 tendered half-a-crown, promising "two bob more" as wages 

 accumulated. This is a fact, and therefore comparable with 

 the anecdote which tells that a military bandmaster 

 demanded the return of a set of teeth supplied at the 

 regiment's expense to a cornet player who had been granted 

 his discharge, 



A Fascinated Boy 



Seas swamped a small cutter as she was beating across 

 the bar of a Northern river. Exerting themselves to the 



