228 MARX TWAIN'S SKETCHES. 



"And oh, Georgy, how divinely beautiful she is!" 



• " Ah, yes — but nothing to what she was before that blessed John Smith broke 



her leg and battered her. nose. Ingenious Smith ! — gifted Smith — noble Smith ! 



Author of all our bliss ! Hark ! Do you know what that wheeze means ? Mary, 



that cub has got the whooping cough. Will you never learn to take care of the i^ 



children!" 



THE END. 



The Capitoline Venus is still in the Capitol at Rome, and is still the most charm- 

 ing and most illustrious work of ancient art the world can boast of. But if ever it 

 shall be your fortune to stand before it and go into the customary ecstacies over it, 

 don't permit this true and secret history of its origin to mar your bliss — and when 

 you read about a gigantic Petrified Man being dug up near Syracuse, in the State 

 of New York, or near any other place, keep your own counsel, — and if the Barnum 

 that buried him there offers to sell to you at an enormous sum, don't you buy. Send 

 him to the Pope!" 



Note. — The above sketch was written at the time the famous swindle of the "Petrified Giant" 

 was the sensation of the day in the United States. 



