AUDUBON—THE HUNTER-NATURALIST. 99 
with which some of them, while yet unfledged, removed them- 
selves from danger to security. 
I grew up, and my wishes grew with my form. Those 
wishes, kind reader, were for the entire possession of all that I 
saw. I was fervently desirous of becoming acquainted with 
Nature. For many years, however, I was sadly disappointed, 
and forever, doubtless, must I have desires that can ot be 
gratified. The moment a bird was dead, however beautiful 
it had been when in life, the pleasure arising from tho pos- 
session of it became blunted; and although the greatest cares 
were bestowed in endeavors to preserve the appearance of 
nature, I looked upon its vesture as more than sullied, as 
requiring constant attention and repeated mendings, while, 
after all, it could no longer be said to be fresh from the 
hands of its Maker.’ I wished to possess all the productions 
of nature, but I wished life with them. This was impos: ble. 
Then what was to be done? I turned to my father, and 
made known to him my disappointment and anxiety. He 
produced a book of Jilustrations. A new life ran in my 
veins. I turned over the leaves with avidity; and although 
what I saw was not what I longed for, it gave me a desire to 
copy Nature. To Nature I went, and tried to imitate her, 
as in the days of my childhood I had tried to raise myself 
from the ground and stand erect, before Nature had imparted 
the vigor necessary for the success of such an undertaking. 
How sorely disappointed did I feel for many years, when 
I saw that my productions were worse than those which 1 
ventured (perhaps in silence) to regard as bad, in the book 
given me by my father! My pencil gave birth to a family 
of cripples. So maimed were most of them, that they re- 
sembled the mangled corpses on a field of battle, compared 
with the integrity of living men. These difficulties and dis- 
appointments irritated me, but never for a moment destroyed 
the desire of obtaining perfect representations of nature.—- 
The worse my drawings were, the more beautiful did I see the 
