180 RECORDS OF A HEART. 



when those aspirings have been vague and undirected ; — when 

 those yearnings have been vain and unappreciated ; — when the 

 genius which would have led its possessor into the sublime 

 mysteries of ideal life, and the affections which would have 

 bestowed a blessing on the realities of existence, have been 

 alike wasted, how full of sorrow are the thoughts which such 

 a contemplation awakens. 



A casket of papers belonging to one who died a few years 

 since, has recently come into my possession ; and seldom have 

 I felt so profound a sadness as has crept over me while looking 

 into the manuscripts, whose faded ink and time-stained paper 

 showed in strange contrast with the glowing words. When I 

 was a child, I used to hear much of the talents and accomplish- 

 ments of Marguerite H*****, and my earliest ambition was 

 excited by the fame of her elegant scholarship and classical 

 attainments. She was then an impulsive, high-minded woman, 

 with a mind that grasped at universal knowledge ; and when, 

 with the vague fantasies of childhood, I ventured to frame 

 pictures of the future, my highest hopes were centered in the 

 thought that I might, at some distant day, attain to the wisdom 

 and celebrity of this brilliant woman. 



Long before I grew old enough however to enter society, 

 Marguerite H***** had withdrawn almost entirely from its lists. 

 She had lost her parents, her brothers had married, and people 

 said she had grown " queer." This dreaded epithet, together 

 with my fortunate discovery that learned women were regarded 

 as a species of monster, cured me of my ambition to attain the 



