THE author's position. 429 



death, to sell the tusks and deliver the proceeds to my 

 men ; but I intended, if my life should be prolonged, to 

 purchase the goods ordered by Sekeletu in England with 

 my own money, and pay myself on my return out of the 

 price of the ivory. This I explained to the men fully, and 

 they, understanding the matter, replied, " Nay, father, you 

 will not die; you will return to take us back to Sekeletu." 

 They promised to wait till I came back; and, on my part, 

 I assured them that nothing but death would prevent my 

 return. This I said, though while waiting at Kilimane a 

 letter came from the Directors of the London Missionary 

 Society stating that "they were restricted in their power 

 of aiding plans connected only remotely with the spread 

 of the gospel, and that the financial circumstances of the 

 society were not such as to afford any ground of hope that 

 it would be in a position, within any definite period, to 

 enter upon untried, remote, and difficult fields of labor." 

 This has been explained since as an effusion caused by tem- 

 porary financial depression ; but, feeling perfect confidence 

 in my Makololo friends, I was determined to return and 

 trust to their generosity. The old love of independence, 

 which I had so strongly before joining the society, again 

 returned. It was roused by a mistaken view of what this 

 letter meant; for the directors, immediately on my reach- 

 ing home, saw the great importance of the opening, and 

 entered with enlightened zeal on the work of sending the 

 gospel into the new field. It is to be hoped that their con- 

 stituents will not only enable them to begin, but to carry 

 out their plans, and that no material depression will ever 

 again be permitted, nor appearances of spasmodic benevo- 

 lence recur. "While I hope to continue the same cordial 

 co-operation and friendship which have always character- 

 ized our intercourse, various reasons induce me to withdraw 

 from pecuniary dependence on any society. I have done 

 something for the heathen; but for an aged mother, who has 

 still more sacred claims than they, I have been able to do 

 nothing, and a continuance of the connection would be a 



