FORTY-FIRST ANNUAL CONVENTION 67 



''You won't be around here very long until you find you are on 

 the wrong side." 



A gentleman entered a restaurant and, seating himself at 

 the table, asked the waiter what he had, and his reply was, 

 ''Calves' liver, sheep's brains and pigs' feet." "I don't want a 

 list of your physical peculiarities, I want to know what you have 

 got to eat." I am not disposed to give you a list of the physical 

 peculiarities of this noble animal, but I am pleased to enumerate 

 some of her deeds for which she is entitled to the consideration 

 that is accorded her at this convention. 



She entered the field of medicine when it was found that 

 association with her was beneficial to patients suffering wifh/ 

 nervousness, and it was but a step from this to the art gallery 

 when it was found that her picture was an effective substitute, 

 and a noted French artist covered the walls of a room at a sani- 

 tarium in France with her picture, and patients were taken 

 there instead of to the field where she roamed at will, andl fhe 

 same quiet and peaceful influence was experienced. 



When the poor, emaciated victim of disease was tossing on 

 the bed of pain, hovering near the brink of Death's dark stream, 

 this noble animal stood in dumb anxiety at the hospital door and 

 offered the Elixir of Life, the restorer of health, and saved an 

 immortal soul. Silently but steadily she wended her way to the 

 orphans' home and saved the motherless babe, whose mother had 

 gone to that land from which no traveler e'er returns, when she 

 gave to the world a son. 



She made herself famous as a campaigner when she elected 

 Peter Porter of Niagara Falls to Congress against the old-time 

 politician James Wadsworth. She put Nebraska in the Demo- 

 cratic ranks because a Republican made her mad, and she elected 

 a Republican in Missouri because a Democrat hurt her feelings, 

 and I am told that Mr. Sullivan, who doesn't overlook anything, 

 flirted with her a little on the question of Illinois' next Senator. 



Like a child that in a quiet, unobtrusive way works its way 

 into our affections and gets hold of our heartstrings, so has this 

 lonesome cow worked its way into the attention and considera- 

 tion and affection of men, whose ingenuity and maney and oppor- 

 tunity has brought her to the front. Two years ago I met Wil- 



