38 ILLINOIS STATE DAIRYMEN'S ASSOCIATION 



WHEN THE COWS COME HOME, 



Judge W. B. Quarton, 



I am a little late in getting here. You know we cannot run 

 the railroads and trains ourselves, but I am mighty glad to be 

 here and bring you greetings from the Iowa State Dairymen's 

 Association. I belie\'e that there should be a little closer connec- 

 tion betw^een the various associations throughout our country, 

 and especially through this western country, and I would like to 

 see a little closer connection between the Illinois and the Iowa 

 Dairymen's Associations. 



Now I notice that on your program they h-^ve me introduced 

 as ''Judge." Now, as a matter of fact I am entitled to that ap- 

 pellation having spent fourteen of the best years of my life at 

 that post, and have been a lawyer all my life, and I know that 

 the average farmer thinks that the average lawyer knows as 

 little about cows and agriculture as any man that walks the 

 earth, and that he doesn't want to know anything about them. 

 Once in a wdiile you will find a foolish fellow like me that takes 

 up with the cow, and you know, it always embarrasses me to 

 have my name on the program as ''Judge" because I am remind- 

 ed of the newsboy that Billy Sunday met here in Illinois, in a 

 little city. The first thing Sunday did when he reached this 

 town w^as to go to the hotel and write a letter and he stopped 

 this little newsboy and said: "Say, boy, where is the postof^ce?" 

 The newsboy said : "I thought everybody knew where the post- 

 ofifice was." And Sunday replied : "I am a stranger here, will 

 you show me the way to the postofifice ?" "Sure," replied the lad, 

 "come right along with me, I am going right by there." The 

 newsboy was a profane little fellow and when they got to the 

 postofifice the newsboy said : "Right there is the postofifice, mis- 

 ter." Billy Sunday thanked him and said: "I wish you would 

 attend my meetings, my boy, I would like to show you the road 

 to heaven." "Show me the road to heaven. Mister? Why, you 

 didn't even know the way to the postofifice!" (Laughter). And 

 so I fear that perhaps some of you may think that I don't know 

 much about dairying. However that may be, I will leave that 

 to you to determine when I get through. (Laughter). 



