136 ILLINOIS STATE DAIRYMEN'S ASSOCIATION 



of a man's fourth wife. He had been pallbearer on each of the 

 occasions of the burial of the three previous wives of his neigh- 

 bor and he had been asked to again act as pallbearer on this oc- 

 casion which was the fourth. He told his wife about it and he 

 seemed to hesitate. She said: "John, aren't you going to go?'* 

 "Yes, I reckon so, but I hate to be accepting these favors all thq 

 time without having a chance to return them." (Roars of Laugh- 

 ter.) 



I come to you, ladies an(S gentlemen, without any prepara- 

 tion. I have just returned from a three weeks' vacation that was 

 necessary, and although I have known it for some time that 1 was 

 to act in this capacity, I did not think it was necessary to burden 

 myself with documents so I am here without any preparation and 

 just like the darky that was tried for felony. The judge asked 

 him if he had somebody to defend him and the darky responded : 

 "No, sir; I am just going to throw myself on the ignorance of 

 the Court." (Laughter.) 



Now, in the preparation of the program for tonight there 

 had to be some changes made and there was a good deal of think- 

 ing and some controversy between the Secretary and me as to 

 how this program was to be carried out inasmuch as the governor 

 is not to be here, and in arranging this program the fact of the 

 matter is that I was made to feel like the woman who had sud- 

 denly become wealthy, and she was asked at the Automobile 

 Show that is now going on, by one of the solicitors if she had de- 

 cided this year on what style of a car she was going to have? "I 

 have not," replied the lady, "but possibly you can give me some 

 assistance. I have not decided whether I will purchase a gaso- 

 line or a limousine car. Pray tell me, does limousine smell as 

 bad as gasoline?" (Laughter.) 



I would like the privilege of reading a telegram received 

 from the Governor about an hour ago: 



"To the Illinois State Dairymen's Association, 

 In Convention Assembled, 



Danville, Illinois, January 31st, 191 7. 

 I wish it were possible for me to attend the 

 Dairymen's meeting. However, my time is so 

 fully occupied with the proposed consolidation of 



