FORTY-THIRD ANNUAL CONVENTION 137 



State agencies that I cannot get away from Spring- 

 field. I think that I can best serve the dairymen 

 and dairy interests of the state by devoting all of 

 my efforts to a re-organization of the state gov- 

 ernment with a real department of Agriculture 

 than in any other way at the present time. I trust • 

 your meeting may be a great success. 



Frank O. Lowden." 



A gentleman traveling through the south was asked after 

 he got back, what kind of a flower the Virginia creeper was, and 

 he said it is not a flower it is a railroad. (Laughter). I want to 

 say to you that if there is anything by the name of Illinois creep- 

 ers, it does not apply to the Chamber of Commerce of Danville; 

 they have certainly made elaborate preparation for this meeting 

 and the success of it is largely due to this effort that they have 

 made and this wonderful entertainment that they have provided 

 for us. (Applause.) 



Now, gentlemen, I don't want to embarrass any of you, 

 there are only 40 or 45 of you to be called upon to make speeches. 

 It is fair to say that these gentlemen have had no notice what- 

 ever, but I want to say to you that you are exactly in the posi- 

 tion of the man that went to a dance and met with a misfortune 

 just before he entered the house with his wife. He stumbled on 

 something and fell down and tore his pants and he was in a ter- 

 rible predicament and the only thing to do was to go inside to 

 mend them. When they got inside it was found necessary to 

 take them off in order to mend them properly. After he had re- 

 moved them his wife shoved him in what she thought was a 

 closet. Later some other ladies came into the dressing room and 

 while they were there he knocked and wanted to get out of there. 

 She said, *'You can't come out here, there are some ladies here." 

 "I don't care who is there," he responded, "I'm in the ballroom." 

 (Roars of laughter). So you gentlemen that I am going to call 

 on are in the ballroom and I take pleasure in introducing to you 

 Mr. Woodbury." 



Mr. Woodbury: 



''Gentlemen and citizens, or rather I should have said first 



