138 ILLINOIS STATE DAIRYMEN'S ASSOCIATION 



'Brother Dairymen' : I am certainly glad to see this large num- 

 ber with us this evening. 



The interest that we have in dairying comes from many 

 sources. I am sure that I would not be quite as white-hair: J as 

 I am, for I am not as old as I appear, if I had not conducted 

 twenty-two auction sales in this town of Jersey cattle and China 

 hogs years ago. But tonight I still have such a wonderful in- 

 terest in this subject and in the grand audience that I knew was 

 here today, for I attended the meeting today, that really I came 

 down on purpose this evening to attend this meeting rather than 

 go to a wedding. You can see how intensely interested I am in 

 the Jersey cow, because of course, that is the only breed there is. 

 (Laughter.) 



I will admit that we do sometimes show partiality and that 

 reminds me of the Southerner who found Uncle Rastus in a deep 

 study. 'What are you thinking about, Uncle Rastus?' was the 

 query. 'I was just considering the chicken. It is a surely 

 wonderful thing about the chicken, you can eat 'em before they 

 is born and after they is dead.' (Laughter). 



Now about these wonderlnl cow stories we hear, about the 

 butterfat, and this, that and the other. I think sometimes there 

 are tv/o versions to them like Rastus and the chicken. I thank 

 you." (Laughter.) 



Mr. Marple: 



''It is wonderful the spirit of loyalty exhibited by men who 

 believe in different breeds of cattle and as we have a representa- 

 tive of another prominent breed of cattle here, I am reminded of 

 a story of two negroes who got to discussing the war. One of 

 them said: 'The allies have got a gun that will shoot 23 miles.' 

 The other fellow said : 'The Germans have got a gun that will hit 

 you if they know your address.' (Laughter and applause). 



An Englishman got into a street car in New York and he ob- 

 served right opposite a woman with an exceedingly homely baby, 

 so much so it fascinated him and he could not keep his eyes off 

 the baby. It annoyed the woman, she noticed it. After a while 

 she finally said, 'Rubber !' and he said : 'Thank God, I thought it 

 was real!' (Laughter.) 



