THE LAND OF THE STALKING DEATH 



399 



weeks the British entered the Transcau- 

 casus at Baku, the Germans cleared out, 

 and Turkey threw up the sponge. 



MORE THAN A HUNDRED DIFFERENT 

 PEOPLES IN THIS REGION 



"Since then we've been doing a kind of 

 police job here, while the Peace Table — 

 heaven help it! — decides. What with a 

 hundred and twenty different peoples, or 

 tribes, in the Transcaucasus, it's even 

 worse than the Balkans. 



"Meanwhile the country's flooded with 

 a billion and a half of paper rubles, issued 

 jointly by the States. The Georgians 

 kept most of it. They're great spenders, 

 and just go on turning out more paper 

 money as it's needed. Their Treasury 

 Department is officially known as the 

 Bureau of Public Printing, and when re- 

 cently they ran out of printing ink, they 

 applied to us for a loan of two thousand 

 British pounds, so as to go off somewhere 

 and buy more. Cool, eh? 



"All three States are doing a lively cus- 

 toms business, there being a baggage in- 

 spection at each of the frontiers, which 

 keeps a civilian passenger pretty busy 

 turning out his traps every hundred miles 

 or so. 



"Through railroad traffic is almost im- 

 possible because of squabbles over the 

 rolling stock. When freight cars arrive 

 from Erivan, the Georgians paint out the 

 Armenian lettering and stencil on their 

 own. And, of course, the Armenians are 

 busy at the same game with Georgian 

 freight cars at their end of the line. Yes, 

 I'd say that the life-blood of the Trans- 

 caucasian republics consists of printing 

 ink and paint. 



HOW TWELVE BRITISH SOLDIERS BROUGHT 

 PEACE 



"Then there was their little postscript 

 war last December. The Georgians and 

 Armenians fell at loggerheads over some 

 boundary dispute, and the latter were 

 getting the best of it. Well, one day an 

 officer of ours, with' a dozen or so Tom- 

 mies, comes along to where the two 

 armies lay on either side of the railroad, 

 about to go at it again. The officer chap 

 jumps in between the opposing forces and 

 makes a bit of a speech from the railroad 

 ties. 



'' 'Commanders of the Georgian and 

 Armenian Armies in being,' he says, 

 'since you can't carry on without killing 

 some of His Majesty's forces, I propose 

 an armistice.' 



"So the British army of twelve sat 

 down to its tea, in between the firing lines, 

 while terms were concluded. And now 

 we are occupying the disputed region, in 

 trust, as it were, and the two republics 

 have called off the dogs of war. Peace 

 reigns in Georgia." 



Hardly had our friend uttered these 

 words when the brakes began grinding, 

 the train came to a stop, and a fusillade 

 of musketry rang out in the near-by town. 



"Comparative peace — I beg your par- 

 don," added the boarding officer with a 

 smile. "Firearms are as necessary to a 

 Georgian's happiness as dolls are to little 

 girls. They must be always shooting, if 

 it's only among themselves. Today's 

 their Red Anniversary, you know, and I 

 suppose that what w T e hear is the result 

 of a vodka party." 



Five minutes later there climbed aboard 

 a rather scared looking Georgian official. 

 He sought out the British colonel com- 

 manding our train and appealed to him 

 for assistance against the crowd of Geor- 

 gian convivialists who were shooting up 

 the countryside. 



"LEND ITS A BRITAIN THOMAS !" 



"Is it war, or mere joy?" coldly in- 

 quired the colonel, who knew the Geor- 

 gian temperament." 



"It is — revolutionary enthusiasm." re- 

 sponded the official, speaking in broken 

 English. "If you have a Thomas — a 

 Great Britain Thomas or so to lend 

 us" 



" 'Fraid not," said the colonel. "I have 

 just four men with me." 



"It is enough !" exclaimed the official 

 joyfully. "The Great Britain Thomas is 

 much respected by my countrymen." 



"So sorry!" And the colonel brought 

 the interview to a close. To us he re- 

 marked after the official's withdrawal, 

 "They obstruct us. shoot our sentries in 

 the back, actually rob 'em of their uni- 

 forms when they catch them alone: and 

 yet at the first signs of disturbance they 

 call upon the Great Britain Thomas to 

 restore order." 



