AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A DOG.— NO. XXII. 



WRITTEN BY HIMSELF. 



{Continued from Page 42.) 



I promised in my last, to give you the closing 

 scene of this first adventure we had with the 

 policeman. I shall have occasion, by-and-by, to 

 return to this worthy; for we had more than one 

 shindy with him, and he invariably got the worst 

 of it. He was as invariably determined to do all 

 in his power to annoy us, — being a most perse- 

 vering enemy. 



Well; we left him and the Plnte proprietor 

 discussing their 125 francs, and the mortification 

 of their unexpected defeat. At the same time, 

 they were consoling themselves with the certainty 

 of being triumphant next time. Nay ; they had 

 even gone so far as to make preparations for ce- 

 lebrating their triumph, — forgetting the old adage, 

 " Don't count your chickens before they are 

 hatched." 



Effectually to secure their game, they beat 

 about for recruits in every quarter ; and by means 

 of plenty of wine, freely given, and plenty more 

 as freely promised, their train was considerably 

 augmented. They succeeded in seducing " David 

 lc Dinde," and "La belle Nannetta," as wel) as 

 his brother; son and nephew also, the opposite 



neighbors to K , two abominable fellows of the 



name of C . 



Of course, nightly meetings were held ; and the 

 wine consumed was really fearful. It was not 

 long, however, before the policeman and his friend 

 were taught such a lesson, that I will venture to 

 say they wished they had not so persevering!/ 

 annoyed and insulted my old master. But he was 

 left without any alternative. Either he must 

 crush this nest of vipers, or he must be crushed 

 himself; or, what was just as bad, he must submit 

 to all their annoyances and insults. The day, 

 however, which quieted them very considerably, 

 at last arrived ; and full of wine and revenge, they 

 occupied their former place before the judge. 

 Bom by x, accompanied by his sons ; also, Jean and 

 Francois, appeared on the side (opposite) as before. 

 The usual routine having been gone through, 

 Bombyx (as on the last occasion) was sworn, and 

 then simply narrated the facts. 



He admitted, that in all probability, had it not 

 been for Frere Jean, he should have taken the law 

 into his own hands, and applied his cane pretty 



smartly about R 's shoulders. He added, that 



he did not think any other punishment could be so 

 well understood by such a low-minded fellow. 



Jean was then called ; and previous to being 

 sworn, was asked the usual question by the 

 magistrate, — "Are you related to any of these 

 parties?" 



Jean gave a queer look at them, and then, 

 stroking his nose, replied, " Je nai pas cet hon- 



neur." (A burst of laughter. R biting his 



lips with rage). Jean took a capacious prise, and 

 then very quietly told the whole story ; neither 

 more nor less. 



Being asked by R if Bombyx had not his 



arm uplifted, with the intention of striking him 

 with his stick — 



" Certainement oui" said Jean, " et apres vos 

 grossierth envers lui, il aurait ire's bien fait de 



vous ecraser. Pourtant, fespere que mainte- 

 nant nous allons vous faire chanter une jolie 

 chanson. 1 ' 



" Cochon que tu es ! w cried R . 



Jean slowly advanced two steps towards him, 

 when the magistrate interfered. 

 " Jean, ayez la complaisance de vous tenir a votre 



place ; et vous, B, , si vous osez insidter encore 



une fois qui que ce soit dans ma presence, je vous 

 mettrai a V amende de 20 francs." 



R quivered with rage. 



Magistrate to R . — " Now, sir, what have 



you to say to this charge ? " 



R . — " Ce que fai a dire c'est que ce sont 



tous des vilains menteurs." 



Before I go any further, I will just say that the 

 charge against R was made as short as pos- 

 sible ; and, following so quickly on the other, it 

 would have appeared revengeful to have made it 

 otherwise. It was for " wilfully and grossly in- 

 sulting Bombyx on the public highway; endeavor- 

 ing to obstruct his passage, &c, &c. ; and finally 

 stigmatising him as a ' vieux gueux.' " 



Magistrate to R . — " Stop, sir. There are 



two parties you have again insulted. I must keep 

 you within bounds. You are fined 40 francs." 



R . — " I am not allowed to say the truth, 



then?" 



Magistrate. — " Go on, sir, with what you have 

 to say." 



R . — " Well, then ; they begun on me. I 



was quietly in my Pinte, when Bombyx was 

 passing by. He suddenly stopped, and made most 

 disgusting grimaces at me. Jean and all his party 

 did the same; and when I came out, as civilly as 

 possible, they threatened to murder me, and Jean 

 encouraged Bombyx to do so. I certainly should 

 not have been alive now, if I had not run back to 

 the Pinte. I have plenty of the most respectable 

 neighbors, who happened just then to be in the 

 Piute, and who are ready to prove this." 



Magistrate. — "Well, let us hear them. Call 

 David B " (Le Dinde). 



In a minute, David arrived. A tall, thin sim- 

 pleton was he in appearance, but in truth he was 

 a cunning villain ; a revengeful rogue ; and he was 

 very wroth against Bombyx, who once used to buy 

 milk, butter, and vegetables of him; till finding the 

 milk converted into chalk and water, the butter 

 into lard, and the vegetables only the dirty refuse 

 of what he had not been able to dispose of at 

 market, — he was compelled to procure what he 

 required elsewhere. This was, of course, a con- 

 siderable source of real profit out of David's pocket 

 — hence his unjust revenge. 



David appeared before the magistrate grinning 

 like an idiot ; but excited and wound up to the 

 highest pitch of phrensy ; and from the effects of 

 the wine swallowed at the Pinte, his face was a 

 bright purple color — his nose of a crimson hue. 



He shook hands with R , looked at the worthy 



magistrate as if he was anxious to confer a similar 

 honor upon him, squeezed his casquette into 

 the smallest possible compass, smiled at every one 

 with inexpressible delight, and even gave a kind 

 of triumphant, friendly, pitying " bon jour " to 

 Jean, who acknowledged this salutation by a look 

 of disdain and another prise. 



David was sworn ; and he declared he was in 

 the " Pinte " when this took place. Jean looked 



