i3° 



RECREA TION. 



POSSIBLE SMILES. 



HORRID DREAMS. 



A good friend of Recreation, who prefers to 

 be called Bryan O'Brien (probably because that 

 is not his name) read these lines in a former 

 number of this magazine : 



Last night an awful dream I had, 

 'Twas a dream that made me shiver ; 



I saw a cat fish for a shad, 



And the shad roe up the river. 



Then he went to bed and dreamed — or rather, 

 I should say, had a nightmare — and recorded it 

 the next morning in this wise : 



One night I dreamed, I vow, 

 Of things that set me crazy; 



I saw a bull rush past a cow 



And the cow slip 'neath a daisy. 



It put me in an awful dread, 

 And gave my nerves a shock, 



To see a horse fly on my bed 



And the bed spring at the clock. 



The final act, I truly hope 



Never again to see — 

 I saw my neck tie up a rope 



And the rope walk off with me. 



HINTS TO HUNTERS. 



Always carry your gun with the muzzle pointed 

 toward you. Then if it accidentally goes off no 

 one but yourself will get hurt. 



In tiring at a bird always aim at its tail. 

 Then you will be sure not to injure it. 



Aim high. You'll accomplish more than if 

 you had a low aim in life. 



Never load your gun until the bird rises. This 

 ■will give it a chance to escape. 



Never kill two birds with one stone. Use a 

 gun. 



In hunting baars it is advisable to carry a tree 

 with you. 



When fox-hunting always carry a piece of 

 limburger cheese in your pocket. There will 

 then be no danger of your losing the scent. 



Jersey is a poor place to hunt snipe. They 

 cannot be distinguished from mosquitoes. 



The main object of hunting is to make as 

 much noise as possible. Therefore bang away 

 constantly if for no other purpose than to let the 

 game know you are coming. 



L. B. C, in Truth. 



Sportsman — Is there any game around here? 

 Native — There was, but the police broke it up 

 last week. 



The bill collector frequently goes hunting but 

 doesn't often bag his game. 



ON THE CLUB VERANDA. 



"I believe Huntley's been shooting on the 

 St. Lawrence." 



"What did he shoot?" 

 " Only the rapids." 



THEY WERE TAME. 



Winks — I understand you have been shoo.ing, 

 old fellow. What did you shoot? 



Blinks — Only a couple of brace of ducks. 



Winks — Were they wild ? 



Blinks — Well, n-n-no, but the farmer was. 



Johnny Mann went out to catch 



Fishes from the sea, 

 Singing : " Prithee, little fish, 



Nearer come to me ! 

 Darling little fishie, stay, 



Prithee, do not swim away !" 



"Dearest Mr. Johnny Mann !" 



Thus the fish replied : 

 "Business calls, and I must go 



Out upon the tide ! 

 That's because I chance to be 



A fish, and not a goose, you see !" 

 — H. C. B., in Albany Times- Union. 



DISCRIMINATION. 



Brown — Oh, no ! I 'm not opposed to women 

 riding bicycles. There are some I would like to 

 see give all their spare time to it. 



Mrs. Brown — Who are they? 



Brown — Well, for instance, the young ladies 

 in this neighborhood who are learning to play 

 the piano. — Truth. 



A silver hook is a great advantage in fishing 

 for complments. 



There is a Harlem girl so modest that she 

 won't listen to a bear story. — Texas Sif tings. 



JUST FROM GEORGIA, 



Oh. we're feelin' mighty happy, 



As along the road we jog; 

 For the fat is on the 'possum, 



An' the bark is on the dog. 



An' life is not a riddle, 



But is happiness complete; 

 For the bow is on the fiddle, 



An' tire move is on the feet ! 



Then sing the joy of livin', 

 An' just go it with a whoop ! 



For the cash is on the counter. 

 An' the oyster's in the soup ! 



— Atlanta Constitution. 



AVENGED. 



Trivvet — I went fishing yesterday. 



Dicer — Get any bites ? 



Trivvet — Only one; but I shot the dog. 



CHEER UP. 



[With apologies to Truths 



Tell me not in mournful numbers 



Life is but an empty dream, 

 That's because you eat cucumbers, 



And at night devour ice-cream. 

 You're dyspeptic, that's the trouble, 



I'll prescribe for your glum capers 

 Buy Recreation — for its worth 



More than all the weekly papers. 



