33° 



RECREATION. 



POSSIBLE SMILES. 



SOME THINGS AS WERE. 



There was a bay cayuse named Dot, 

 That had a white eye and got hot. 

 When the boys tried to ride him, 

 But they fell off beside him, 

 And just wanted to die on the spot. 



There was a red-headed young maid, 



Who of cows and mice was afraid, 



But she died and went up 



With St. Peter to sup, 



Where no bovines or rodents e'er strayed. 



A wealthy young man with a gun, 



Traveled out in the west for some fun, 



But the game he did get, 



Was the dealer's own pet, 



And he lived a whole week on a bun. 



— M. W. Miner. 



The Indian, with his pipe of peace, 

 Will soon have passed away ; 



But Paddy, with his piece of pipe, 

 Has come, prepared to stay. — Truth, 



Mr. Decker had been entertaining a party of 

 his friends in the parlor and the aroma of their 

 Perfectos still lingered in the curtains. Mrs. 

 Decker was properly disgusted as she came into 

 the room. She threw the windows wide open 

 and remarked : 



" It's all very well to talk about this new 

 smokeless powder, but I don't see why some body 

 hasn't gumption enough to invent a smokeless 

 tobacco." 



Mr. Wearie — Have you any magazines pub- 

 lished in Kamschatka or the South Sea Islands ? 



Newsman — N-o. Won't you have one of the 

 American or European magazines? 



Thanks ; no. I am getting a little tired of 

 Napoleon Bonaparte. — New York Weekly. 



I shot an arrow into the air ; 

 It fell to earth — I knew not where, 

 Till a neighbor called and raised a row, 

 Because I'd shot his Jersey cow. 



N. Y. Herald. 



A Game Leg — The Quarter of Venison. 



A sleigh ride to my girl I gave, 



And as the horses flew, 

 I could not help but think how fast 



My cash was flying too ! 



— N. Y. Herald. 



" Whur ye bin ? " asked one rural sportsman. 



" Fishin'," replied the other. 



"Git a bite?" 



"Yep." 



" Ketch anything?" 



"Yep." 



" Whatje ketch ? " 



' ' Ketched the mosquiter thet gimme the bite. 



The man goes walking down the road. 



Hipity hop, flap doodle ! 

 His heart seems bowed with a heavy load, 



Slipity slop, kadoodle ! 



Ah ! what is the poor man going to do ? 



Flipity flop, befuddle ! 

 He's got a loose sole down under his shoe, 



Flipity flap, bespuddle ! 



The sole and the mud get awfully mixed, 



Whipity whap, kewaddle 1 

 He's bound for the shoe shop to have it fixed, 



Whipity whop, skedaddle ! 



— Calhoun Times. 



"Well, sir, the people had better look out five 

 years from now." 



" Why, what will turn up then ?" 

 " The year 1900 is going to be a bad year." 

 ' ' What makes you think that ?" 

 "Because it will be so naughty." 



— A tlanta Journal. 



"Why," growled the large raw-boned man 

 who was hanging on to a strap ; " why do we 

 permit the minions of this transportation cor- 

 poration to pack us in here like a lot of sardines ?" 



"Because we are suckers," replied the little 

 weak-eyed man. — Cincinnati Tribune. 



Two soles with but a single thought 

 Two feet that slipped as one ; 



And when at last he reached the earth, 

 The meeting jarred the son. 



— Boston Courier. 



Little drops of water, 

 Little grains of sand. 

 Are freely used by the milkman, 

 The grocer, baker and, 

 Cost the rest of us 

 A lot of money. 

 P. S. — This don't rhyme very well, but it gets 

 there just the same. 



Digley — What did you do with the check your 

 father-in-law gave you ? 



Gagley — Had it framed ; no one would cash 

 it for me. 



As down the village street he walked, 



A barber shop he spied — 

 Sauntered in, sat down in chair, 



And had his whiskers dyed ; 

 Then hurried home to his dear friends, 



Made his will and went to bed — 

 Alas ! next morn when he awoke, 



His whiskers — they were dead. 



-J. S. 



Digley — Does Howler's wife practice her 

 pieces at home before singing them in church ? 



Gagley — I imagine so ; Howler never goes to 

 church. 



