62 



KIDD'S LONDON JOURNAL. 



I know, Miss Firkin, is, that our geraniums 

 are all pining away for want of fresh earth, 

 and that I am sent in furious haste after a 

 load of your best garden pots. There's no 

 time to be lost, I can tell you, if you mean 

 to save their precious lives. Miss Ada is 

 upon her last legs, and master Diomede in 

 a galloping consumption — two of our prime 

 geraniums, ma'am ! " quoth Dick, with a 

 condescending nod to Miss Wolfe, as that 

 Lilliputian lady looked up at him with a 

 stare of unspeakable mystification ; " queer- 

 ish names, a'nt they ? Well, there are the 

 patterns of the sizes, and there's the order : 

 so if your little gentleman will but look the 

 pots out, I have left the cart in Jem Tyler's 

 yard (I've a message to Jem from master), 

 and we can pack 'em over the paling. I 

 suppose you've a ladder for the little man's 

 use,* in loading carts and waggons ; if not 

 Jem or I can take them from him. There 

 is not a better-natured fellow in England 

 than Jem Tyler, and he'll be sure to do me 

 a good turn any day, if it's only for the 

 love of our Mayfly here. He bred her, 

 poor thing, and is well nigh as fond of her 

 as if she was a child of his own ; and so's 

 Sam. Nay, what's the matter with you 

 all ? '\ pursued Dick, as at the name of Jem 

 Tyler Miss Wolfe turned up her hands and 

 eyes, Mr. Lamb let fall the pattern pots, and 

 Miss Philly flung the order upon the coun- 

 ter — " What the deuce is come to the 

 people ! " 



And then, out burst the story of the last 

 night's adventure : of Mr. Lamb's scratched 

 face, which indeed was visible enough, of 

 Miss Wolfe's bruises, of the broken china, 

 the cow, the donkey, and the action at law. 



" Whew ! " whistled Dick, in an aside 

 whistle ; • ■ going to law is she ? We must 

 pacify her if we can," thought he, "for a 

 lawsuit's no joke, as poor Jem would find. 

 Jem must come and speechify. It's hard if 

 between us we can't manage a woman." 



" Sad affair, indeed, Miss Firkin," said 

 Dick, aloud, in a soft, sympathising tone, 

 and with a most condoling countenance; 

 " it's unknown what obstropolous creatures 

 cows and donkies are, and what mischief 

 they do amongst gimcracks. A brute of a 

 donkey got into our garden last summer, 

 and ate up half-a-dozen rose-trees and 

 fuchsias, besides trampling over the flower 

 beds. One of the roses was a present from 

 France, worth five guineas. I hope Mr. 

 Lamb and Miss Wolfe are not much hurt. 

 Very sad affair ! Strange, too, that it should 

 happen through Jem Tyler's cattle — poor 

 Jem, who had. such a respect for you ! " 



" Respect for me ! " echoed Miss Philly, 

 " when he called me a chattering old maid — 

 Mrs. Loveit heard him. Respect for me ! " 



" Aye," continued Dick, " it was but last 



Monday was a fortnight that Kit Mahony, 

 the tall pig dealer, was boasting of the 

 beauty of the Tipperary lasses, and crying 

 down our English ladies ; whereupon, al- 

 though the tap was full of Irish chaps, Jem 

 took the matter up, and swore that he could 

 show Kit two as fine women, in this very 

 street — you, ma'am being one, and Miss 

 Parsons the other — two as fine women as 

 ever lie saw in Tipperary. Nay, he offered 

 to lay any wager, from a pot of double X 

 to half a score of his own pigs, that Kit 

 should confess it himself. Now, if that's not 

 having a respect, I don't know what is," 

 added Dick, with much gravity; " and I put 

 it to your good sense, whether it is not 

 more likely that Mrs. Loveit, who is as deaf 

 as a post, should be mistaken, than that he 

 should offer to lay such a wager respecting 

 a lad}- of whom he had spoken so dis- 

 paragingly." 



" This will do," thought Dick to himself, 

 as he observed the softening of Miss Philly's 

 features, and noted her very remarkable 

 and unnatural silence — " this will do ; and 

 reiterating his request that the order might 

 be got ready, he walked out of the shop. 



" You'll find that I have settled the mat- 

 ter," observed the young gentleman to 

 Jem Tyler, after telling him the story, 

 "and you have nothing to do but to 

 follow up my hints. Did not I manage 

 her famously ! 'Twas well I recollected your 

 challenge to Mahony about that pretty 

 creature, Harriet Parsons. It had a capital 

 effect, I promise you. Now, go and make 

 yourself decent ; put on your Sunday coat, 

 wash your face and hands, and don't spare 

 for fine speeches. Be off with you." 



" I shall laugh in her face," replied Jem. 



" Not you," quoth his sage adviser ; "just 

 think of the length of a lawyer's bill, and 

 you'll be in no danger of laughing. Besides, 

 she's really a niceish sort of a body enough — 

 a tidyish little soul in her way, and you're 

 a gay widower : so, who knows ? " 



And home^went Dick, chuckling all the 

 way, partly at his own good management — 

 partly at the new idea which his quick 

 fancy had started. 



About a fortnight after, I had occasion 

 to drive into Belford, attended as usual by 

 master Richard. The bells of St. Stephen's 

 were ringing merrily as we passed down 

 Oriel-street ; and, happening to look up at 

 the well-known sign of the Old Red Cow, 

 we saw that celebrated work of art sur- 

 mounted by a bow of white ribbons, a bri- 

 dal favor. Looking onward to Miss Philly's 

 door, what should we perceive but Mr. 

 Lamb standing on the step with a similar 

 cockade, half as big as himself, stuck in his 

 hat ; whilst Miss Wolfe stood simpering be- 

 hind the counter, dispensing to her old 



