STICE'S CHRISTMAS TURKEY. 



Old man Stice was a veteran of the Black 

 Hawk war, full of stories which delighted 

 us boys and made us wish we had lived in 

 the days when the woods were filled with 

 game of all sorts and a boy didn't have to 

 go far in search of adventure. Many an af- 

 ternoon when the shadows began to grow 

 long, we gathered under the old apple trees 

 at the back of our lot and listened to some 

 of old man Stice's stories. 



"It wuz jest the day afore Christmas," 

 the old man said, "an' I told my wife I reck- 

 oned I'd go out an' see if I couldn't git a 

 wild turkey or maybe a deer to kinder liven 

 up our Christmas dinner. Thar wuz a purty 

 heavy snow on the groun', an' jest arter I 

 set out, it begun to sleet an' rain a leetle, 

 an' in less than no time the hull kentry wuz 

 jest one glare of ice, an' every livin' thing 

 thet hed any sort of shelter to go to wuz 

 under it. I didn't ketch sight of a feather, 

 an' thar warn't so much as a cottontail out 

 foragin'. 



"I couldn't make up my mind to go back 

 without anythin' an' jest make our Christ- 

 mas dinner on spareribs, so I tramped on 

 all day. Once as I wuz gittin' 'crost the 

 creek the ice give way with me an' I got a 

 good duckin'. I didn't keer fer thet so 

 much, though thar's no denyin' it wuz a 

 leetile oncomfortable, but the water got 

 into my powder horn an', of course, thet put 

 an' end to my shootin', even if thar wuz 

 anythin' to shoot. I hed one shot in my 

 rifle, howsomever, an' the water didn't spile 

 thet 'cause I held the gun up over my 

 head. 



"Well, thar wuz nothin' fer me to do but 

 go home, disappinted and empty handed. 

 We didn't make many presents in them 



days. Thar wuz none of your cellyloid 

 manicure sets in plush cases, or arter dinner 

 coffe cups, cut glass fixin's, an' all thet sort 

 of tomfoolery. The principal business of 

 the day wuz eatin', an' some great spreads 

 we hed. Roast pig, chicken pie, wild turkey 

 an' ven'son, home-made hominy, punkin 

 pie, wild honey, cider, an' other things too 

 many to mention, an' which I won't, seein' 

 as how I don't want to make you oneasy an' 

 set you a-wishin' time would turn back'ards 

 fer a spell. 



"Thet year had been a kinder off one. 

 Choleree, yawps, or somethin' or other hed 

 got into our fowls an' they hed all died off, 

 'cept a decreepit ole rooster an' a few moiv- 

 bid hens. Consequence wuz thar warn't 

 nothin' fer our Christmas dinner only hog 

 an' hominy, an' as I said afore, I wuz con- 

 siderable downcast over not gittin' any 

 game. 



"It wuz gittin' dark as I come through 

 the timber which stood 'round our clearin' 

 when, happenin' to look up, I wuz com- 

 pletely dumbfoundered, fer thar a-roostin' 

 on one of the lower limbs of a shellbark 

 hick'ry wuz 19 of the biggest wild turkeys 

 I ever see. 



"Now, you know I only hed the one shot, 

 on account of my powder bein' wet, an' I 

 wanted to git more'n one o' them birds. 

 I knowed as soon as I shot, thet every one 

 o' them turkeys as warn't hit would scatter 

 fer all parts of kingdom come, fer they 

 warn't fairly settled fer the night, as I could 

 tell by the way they'd moved over an' 

 changed 'round. So I slipped aroun' till I 

 got 3 of 'em in line, turned the old rifle 

 loose and we had turkeys to burn, after all. 



Villager (gazing at the ' ruins) — Hello! 

 been a wreck here, hasn't there? 



Railway Officer (hastily concealing a cut 

 on his head and a broken arm) — No, sir; 

 not on this line, — Exchange. 



430 



