CALIFORNIA AVOCADO ASSOCIATION 



43 



myself a job of hard work by making a move to attempt the extermination 

 of the ugly alligator from our beautiful avocado world. Until the receipt, 

 a couple of months ago, of the Association's year-book, I really didn't 

 know that I was the lone committeeman to start the war, especially among 

 the hotels, cafes, etc., and was awaiting the appearance of some companions 

 in arms, for I'm not an old campaigner in this war. Until recently, the 

 only destructive weapon I ever raised against the alligator pear was a 

 spoon. While waiting to hear of the appointment of some valiant alligator 

 hunters, I have, upon numerous occasions, twisted the tail of the alligator, 

 and with every twist have realized how big the tail is, and the wish has 

 gone forth that some St. Patrick, or Siegfried might arise and rid the 

 avocado world of the alligator. It will be hard, but not impossible work. 

 It is simply one feature of the great problem of educating the public up 

 to the eating point, which now confronts the expanding production of the 

 avocado orchards. 



The expenses of this general campaign of publicity will have to be 

 borne by all those who are in any way interested in the production of the 

 avocado. Few others will help, for the general public has an idea that 

 the avocado grower will be able and ready, willing and waiting, to pay 

 ofF Uncle Sam's war debt, as soon as the trouble is over. 



The Association has no war chest, and so, the lone committeeman, 

 not having been provided with any of the "sinews of war," has been able 

 to carry on only a sort of guerrilla warfare, for the love of the sport. 

 Hence this partial report of incomplete work. 



While most of the hotel and cafe men still use the name alligator 

 pear, so far I have found but one who positively refused to favor any 

 move to change. He said he had always used alligator pear, considered 

 it right, and would always call it that, regardless of what others did. I 

 will not name him, but he it was, of whom Martin F. Tupper, the pro- 

 verbial philosopher, wrote: 



*'Habit, with him, was all the test of truth; 

 It must be right, I've done it from my youth." 



In general hotel men seem to be not unfavorably disposed to the 

 movement, provided the public is satisfied. 



This reason, alone, explains their chariness about changing. The 

 true caterer aims always to give the public that which is pleasing thereto, — 

 in other words, give what is wanted. For example, some years ago, a 

 notorious bad man of the West went into Sam Dutton's hotel cafe in 

 Denver. He was full of bad whiskey and some appetite, and ordered 

 the waiter to bring him some rattlesnakes, fried, well done, with plenty 

 of Tobasco, punctuating his order with profanity and an exhibition of 

 his gun. When the quick-witted chef got the order he happily thought 

 of some eels which he had in the ice-box, and which he promptly prepared 

 and served, coiled up like a rattler pointing its head at the would-be diner. 

 At the St. Francis Hotel, in San Francisco, guests can order nice fresh 

 whale steaks, chops and cutlets for breakfast. If hearers doubt this 

 statement, I refer you to Victor Hirtzler himself who is responsible there- 

 for, and whom I am much pleased to see on the program today. 



In Mr. Hirtzler's presence and participation in this convention of 

 avocranks, I see one of the best signs of the times in the avocado world. 



