CAUSES OF FAILURE 9 



sealskin jacket. You don't deserve beautiful Roses, 

 and you won't have any until you love them more.' 

 If I am accused of discourtesy to the fair sex (she 

 was not very fair, my reader), I can only plead that I 

 have been far more explicit with the male specimen 

 of pseudo-Rosist. ^ I say, old fellow,' remarked to 

 me a friend as we rode together in the Row, and 

 with a tone which, though it pretended a cheery 

 indifference, was fraught with rebuke and anger, 

 ^ those Rose-trees, which you recommended me to 

 get, turned out a regular do. Cost a hatful of money 

 — precious near a tenner^ if not all out — and, by Jove, 

 sir ! our curate at the county flower-show came and 

 licked them all into fits ! ' * Robert,' I responded (I 

 was too indignant to address him with Bob, as usual), 

 ^ I never in my life recommended a person of your 

 profound ignorance to have anything to do with 

 Roses. You asked me to give you a list of the best, 

 and I did so reluctantly, knowing that you had 

 neither the taste nor the energy to do them justice. 

 As to the outlay, the animal on which you have 

 recklessly placed yourself, and whose hocks are a 

 disgrace to this park, cost you, I know, more than 

 eighty guineas ; and for a tithe of that sum, without 

 further supervision or effort, you expect a beautiful 

 Rose-garden. I rejoice to hear that the curate beat 

 you, just as that Eton boy on his nimble pony is 



