•LIFE- 



The Wall (st) Rus and the 

 Car (newhaven) Penter 



The Walrus and the Carpenter 



Rode in a private car ; 

 They wept like anything to feel 



Its awful jolt and jar. 

 " If we can get to Providence, 



New York won't seem so far." 



"With seven men, and seven spikes, 



And three new hemlock ties, 

 Do you suppose," the Walrus said, 



" We could economize ? " 

 " I doubt it," said the Carpenter. 



" I'd ralhcr advertise." 



"Oh, Oysters, come and ride with us," 



The Walrus did beseech. 

 " A pleasant ride, a safe, quick ride ; 



Our roadbed is a peach. 

 Once over Harlem River bridge, 



New York you well may reach." 



A shrewd old Oyster looked at him 



And sagely shook his head ; 

 The shrewd old Oyster winked his eye. 



"T'll go on foot," he said. 

 " I really would much rather walk 



Than ride, and get there dead." 



Then four young Oysters hurried up 



And other Oysters followed them 

 And hustled through the fence ; 



Though thi.5 was scarcely odd, because 

 They hadn't too much sense. 



" But wait a bit," the Oysters cried. 

 With really groundless fear; 



" Suppose that there should be a wreck 

 Some place 'twixt there and here?" 



The Carpenter said nothing, but 

 " We'll blame the engineer." 



"The time has come," the Walrus said, 



" To think of other things : 

 Of tariff, national finance, 



And politics, and rings; 

 And why we go to Albany, 



Or Saratoga Springs." 



" But what of us? " the Oysters cried. 



" Don't WE cut any ice? 

 How long shall we be maimed and killed? 



We merely ask advice." 

 The Carpenter said nothing, but 



" These dividends are nice." 



"I weep for you," the Walrus said, 



" And deeply sympathize." 

 With sobs and tears he gobbled up 



A trolley-car franchise, 

 I-Iolding a bunch of common stock 



Before his streaming eyes. 



" Oh, Oysters," said the Carpenter, 

 " V/e've had a pleasant call, 



What further can we do for you? 

 We mean to help you all." 



And this was very odd, because 

 He meant it not at all. 



H. P. D. 



