24 



COLLEGE LIFE. 



[Chap. II. 



again afflicted with the distressing malady from which it had 

 taken him two years to recover, in 1826-28. He left home, 

 July 22, and the next month set out on that journey on the 

 continent from which he was not to return. I remained in 

 Bristol to take his share of pulpit duty. Knowing how deeply 

 Philip loved him, it is striking to find scarcely any allusion to 

 him in his letters ; but what he does write about him shows 

 that he could not bear to write more. He once said that he 

 had little u hope " in his nature, and found it best " quietly to 

 wait ; ,? and while waiting, he threw his mind into his college 

 pursuits, and did not reject the gaiety of college jests. " In 

 my last session " (he wrote to Brooke Herford, in the letter 

 already quoted *) " I had a very pressing invitation to go back to 

 my old work [at 24, Regent Street] : I soon should have had 

 £200 a year, and a good chance of making my fortune. For a 

 little time I thought I ought to accept it, for the sake of the 

 family; but they have been sufficiently provided for, and I have 

 never regretted declining it." He wrote to me at the time 

 (November 10, 1839) : " My aunt's letter was to me no tempta- 

 tion, for when I reflect on the life of a minister ... I cannot 

 fancy myself happy in any other employment; . . . but I 

 thought whether it was right that I should deliberately choose 

 a mode of life in which I could not hope to be of much assist- 

 ance to the family, when another was offered in which I might. 

 . . . When this was settled, right glad was I to find that Aunt 

 M. was satisfied, as well as the people at home.' 7 It is touch- 

 ing to think how anxious this youngest son was, not only to 

 save his family every possible expense, by the strictest economy, 

 but to help to bear their burdens ; but he saw how his sisters 

 were spending their strength and energy in their school, and 

 the spirit of that home was strong within him. 



It was a rare thing for him then to enter in his letters on 

 religious subjects ; but on my next birthday he expressed his 

 earnest hope that we might become " better and better Chris- 

 tians : there may be excuses for others, but there is none for 

 us, for it is our business to learn to be good, so as to teach 

 others. I think we ought to consider this one of our greatest 



* p. 10. 



