122 
THE RAT. 
fashion, dancing with the rival of your intended. What 
unconscious cruelty were you then perpetrating upon one 
who doated on you — upon one who, amid the gorgeous splen- 
dour and glittering throng, saw nothing but you — and you 
dancing with her rival. Fie upon you ! With what finished 
grace you led the hated one to the dance ; then how you 
exerted every nerve to round with ease and elegance your 
every action, by which you thought you were making rapid 
strides in the affections of your chosen one ; but which dis- 
play was, in reality, cramping her very heart with jealousy. 
Talk of etiquette ; I believe my good old Yorkshire grand- 
mother's etiquette, if not the most fashionable, was at least 
more natural ; she was eighty- two when last at a ball, and 
she then declared that my grandfather, who was three years 
older than herself, should never dance with any one but her 
while she was living ; and, what is more, she kept her word, 
and was proof to the last against all appeals. It may appear 
quaint or even vulgar in me, but I cannot help thinking she 
was right, when we see so many miserable consequences 
arising out of this first familiarity in a ball-room. 
Unconscious of all around, there. Sir Charles , sat the 
idol of your heart, biting the rat-skins till she had laid the 
ends of her fingers bare. At that moment, sir, she was a 
perfect little cannibal, and would have bitten you and her rival 
to pieces with more avidity and less remorse than she did her 
rat-skin gloves. Presently she quitted the room, and left 
for you a card, requesting you not, on any account, to call 
upon her till this evening. Now, sir, I would sooner be 
fastened in a barn with five hundred rats, were I you, than 
be locked in a room with this pretty little cannibal. Indeed, 
sir, I would rather present her with fifty pairs of prepared 
rat-skins, carcasses and all, than listen for half an hour to one 
of her reproving sermons. Nevertheless, were I in her 
place, as a punishment for your thoughtlessness, you should 
swallow the remainder of the gloves — both pairs I mean — 
before I would pardon your seeming perfidy. 
There was one interesting circumstance, connected with 
the ball-room, which I have yet to mention. While your 
little white rose. Sir Charles , was quietly eyeing your 
every movement. Lady Rattle, in the most courteous and 
inquisitive manner advanced, and thus addressed her : — " My 
