126 
THE RAT. 
recourse to tlie following admirable stratagem. " Sir," said i 
he, at the same time holding up the thing in question upon 
his fork, ''is this the remnant of a ' quack, quack, quack V" 
to which question the commissioner significantly shook his* 
head, as much as to say that it was not a " quack, quack, 
quack," but said it was a " bow, wow, wow." The astounded 
admiral was not willing to believe his own ears. Indeed he 
strove, hj every means in his power, to persuade himself^ 
that the commissioner was either joking, or did not under- 
stand him ; therefore, to satisfy himself, he asked more slowly ; 
and emphatically than before, if it were a '' quack — quack — 
quack." To which the smiling commissioner again shook his j 
head, and replied with equal distinctness, " bow — wow — 
wow," which made the admiral look grave and serious, as 
if he thought it was a matter rather derogatory to the . 
honour of England for a Chinaman to poke fun at a British 
admiral. He suddenly grew warm, and in a guttural tone 
said, " Confound the fellow ! is it a ' quack, quack, quack V " 
When the commissioner, with equal warmth and quickness, ■ 
snappishly replied, ''bow, wow, wow." They then, as with 
one impulse, rose to their legs, as did also the attendants on 
both sides. The admiral stam])ed and roared, while the 
commissioner jumped and screeched. At last they became 
so enraged with each other, that they roared, stamped, 
jumped, and screamed, till nothing was heard but a hoarse 
" quack, quack, quack," and a screeching " bow, wow, wow." 
At this moment in came the interpreter, who soon brought 
the floundering admiral to an anchorage ; for no sooner had 
the admiral caught sight of him, than with clenched fist upon 
the table, and in a voice of thunder, he demanded an instant 
explanation as to what he had been eating. To which 
demand the interpreter complied, by telling him, in the most 
bland and conciliating manner possible, that it was a mag- 
nificent roast-puppy, the ofispring of Lady Lyn's favourite 
lap-dog, and which the commissioner himself had that morn- 
ing purloined to do honour to the occasion. The admiral 
vStood aghast. It is needless to say he had quite finished his 
dinner ; and for decency's sake rushed out of the room. 
This extraordinary departure so astonished the worthy com- 
missioner, that he stood perfectly bewildered, till the inter- 
preter fully explained the nature of the case ; because, till 
